The air I breathe

Tis the season to be teary.

2012-01-29T05:03:00.001+08:00

Another day, another heartbreak. Regretfully, I screwed up. Yet again. I am an idiot when it comes to dealing with people on a personal level. And I'm sorry, I won't do it again. But was it really that serious until you had to say the things you said? Bring up the past. Point out the flaws. Doubt my sincerity. With every sentence spoken, I swear I died a little more inside.

And I was on the road to recovery, thinking it's all going to be alright. It's all going to be alright. When you tell me you're leaving tomorrow. TOMORROW! And then you had to ask "are you okay?". I don't know. Am I? I don't know what am I if I'm not OK. But to tell you the truth, I really don't know what am I. You're leaving. You're just going to announce that and expect me to wave and smile and say "have fun in the island of sunshine and sandy beaches love! With a female friend too! Whom you'll be bunking with!"

To be honest I really want to do that. I really want to see you happy doing what you think is right. What you feel like doing. You've given your reasons, it's a favor owed, now it's time to return it. But deep down inside there's a consistent voice that says "stay. don't go. how am I going to get through another 21 days and counting without seeing you?" But of course that would be selfish. Inconsiderate. It's your life. You do what you want to do. Right?

I swallowed the words. Wiped off the tears and mustered up enough bravado to say "have fun." Another word, and I'd be a puddle. And yet you keep asking "are you okay?" How am I supposed to say No, I'm not. I don't want you to go and have fun. I want you to stay at home, so that I can have it easier for the next 3 weeks? Worry about it when the time comes. Who knows if there is connection after all. The point is, why would you go before making sure? Did it never even cross your mind?

I don't understand how a damn relationship works. If it's going hurt whenever the other person does something that doesn't involve you in the equation, why bother with a relationship? Why demand that level of attachment when you refuse to do the same? Why expect so much when you don't set the standard by your own words and actions? I'm trying. Simple words. Easy to say. Anyone can try. I can try to stand. Am I standing? No. But I'm trying. What good is trying if there is no difference in the grand conclusion of things? Another day, another heartbreak.

After so long, there's one distinct feeling whenever the heart wrenching begins. I'm living by a thread. Hanging on, just waiting for something that I screw up terrible enough that you would cut it and send me tumbling into oblivion. And then you say, "do you know that I love you very, very much?" Do I? You do say so. I believe so. But why does it hurt so badly?

These words are just tumbling out. It probably doesn't even make sense to you. Do you really want to know every thought that I have? Every emotion that I feel when it comes to you? Do you really? Maybe. But if you knew half of it, you wouldn't. It hasn't been easy for me. I feel as though I keep trying and trying but yet still can't get anything done right. You keep telling me this is wrong, that is wrong, you should not do this/that and every single damn time I brace myself for the eventual "you know what? This just isn't going to work out. You're not ready."

How do I even begin to convince you that ALL THESE FUCKING FEELINGS ARE BOILING OVER AND ABOUT TO IMPLODE? HOW? Because you don't want to believe so. You may say that you do, but after so long. After all that's been said and done. You're still not convinced.

I don't know how it got from me screwing up to you doubting. But this I know for sure, it hurts. But yet I still don't want to lose you. Who has stockholm syndrome now?

An idiot.

Just to see you.

2012-01-25T21:47:00.001+08:00

I have traveled for more than 4 hours in a cramped space.
Not slept the entire trip anticipating the moment I get to see you.
Been at the edge of my seat through every meal.
Just to get let down.

tyoriginal

Why so serious?

2012-01-23T13:12:00.002+08:00

For CNY, my mom bought me 2 shirts. One says Hug Me and the other says Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. You'd think that my mom's pretty cool, but just now when I told her "Mom, ang pow done being collected. Now let's go!" In return, she kicked me. Y U KICK ME MOM?

Also, I'm thinking whether I should detour off to Singapore after visiting my grandma in Johore. Hum, hum. If I do plan to do so, then I should bring my passport along, but the causeway will surely be super jam due to the CNY traffic. Maybe I should save this trip for another day? Ahh, dilemma.

My blog posts have been kinda serious lately. Where has fun Tsing gone? I don't know! Ask the doc. Who banned me from eating seafood. For a week! CNY WEEK!!!!! All the fresh and juicy prawns, crabs, lobsters, abalone, shark fin. T__T Aku amat kesian. I should definitely hop down to SG get some new shoes make myself feel better. KAN!

Semua benda aside, HAPPY CNY EVERYBODEH! Why u all no give comment. I like reading comments! Sengaja kan. I remove the cbox then terus all malas. Okay, gotta start speed-packing (yea, I coined that word. It's like speed-boating, where you boat really fast. Go figure) if I wanna make it to the car in time! Who am I kidding. I'm designated driver. Drink all the coffee.

(Pic unrelated:OH YEA BABEH. Hot chocolate + marshmallows. The life.)

tyoriginal

My worrisome lover.

2012-01-23T09:47:00.002+08:00

You are extremely adorable. :D Gonna miss you plenty.

tyoriginal

My body is at war with me.

2012-01-22T07:40:00.002+08:00

Seriously? 2 days before CNY and this? The great rash returns? Let's do a run through of all the other times in my life when I had the great rash:

2004 (form 3) - out of the blue, we were in lab, suddenly, my legs started to itch like there was no tomorrow. Rub-a-dub dub, next thing you know, off to calamine land.

2009 - It was my first semester in university. One of the first few months I was in KK. I stayed at my friend's dorm room for 1 night, the next morning, I was covered in texture. Rushed to the clinic, got more calamine, bathed in that sweet sweet substance.

2012 - Last night while skyping. Suddenly, my chest area was unbearably itchy, doused it with cold water, it went to my arms, to my legs. Then it's back. The great rash is back.

tyoriginal

Of emails, skype sessions and text messages.

2012-01-20T03:55:00.000+08:00

It amazes me sometimes the things that I would do for you. On one hand, I think I'm going insane. I tell myself, woman, you could use your time to do better things such as [finally] learning how to make 3D cards instead of just sitting around staring at a picture on your mobile phone. On the other hand, I think I have finally found the bloody switch. Turns out it wasn't for me to find, but for someone else to point me in the right direction. It was there all along, but I was searching for it everywhere else but where it really is.

Remember when we first got together, it was insane. So many questions, so many variables, so many "what if's". It's not even been a month but this is it. This is what we've been missing out on for such a long time. This is what everyone's looking for and we've got it in our hands. I wouldn't say that it's been smooth sailing all the way. Plenty of hiccups, plenty of bumps, plenty of dirty salty seawater splashing in our faces at the wrong time and strong winds blowing in the wrong direction but this is it. And the words "Here. Right here." still rings in my head like the first time I thought I've gone insane.

I don't know if you still doubt. I don't know if you're still unsure. But one thing's for sure: I'm in.

(Pic unrelated: Just because everything silver lights up your face :D)

tyoriginal

Acceptance.

2012-01-15T11:14:00.000+08:00

There are often qualities in people in your circle of close friends that you are not really comfortable with. Initially, you may employ ignorance. Pretend it is not important in any way. Pretend it will be something that only surface once in a blue moon. With time, you realize this is not something that just happens occasionally, and there you go - annoyance. With the increasing amount of annoyance, and the refusal to hurt the other party by telling them that you are not comfortable with some of their traits, perhaps, wanting to hold on to that bridge, refusing to give up because you don't want to lose that person, you get frustration.

Time goes by. Day after day. You are still frustrated, but you notice that those seemingly irritating traits that used to annoy you so much annoys you less these days. You are used to it. You expect it. You see it coming. You are ready to tackle it when it's there. After some time, you realize that there's no use being so frustrated about something you cannot change about another person, that you just have to love them for who they are. This is where you get acceptance.

I have not blogged about you in depth. I never thought I could. I'm not a person who is good with words. Maybe in tweaking sentences to obtain a certain impact that I want it to have, but not with words. You on the other hand, have the ability to just speak what's on your mind without caring about the consequences (good or bad). Skipping to the chase, I am illogically drawn to you. Like how a snail would (in a strange and crazy situation) be drawn to salt.

There are times when you say things and you do things that make me so frustrated and angry but I just cannot describe what I really want to say to you at those moments. Instead, I lash out, curse, push you away, irk you, aggravate you until there's 2 angry persons instead of just 1. I hate the way you seemingly have the ability to crush me just with words alone. I hate the way you brush small matters away and diss things that seem unimportant to you. It's always the small matters, the unimportant things that matters the most. Most of all, I hate that everything I do (or don't) or say (or don't) is under maximum scrutiny. You judge, you analyze, all to feed that insane need to categorize people so that you may one day exploit their characteristics to your own agenda.

You say stop finding fault. I don't know how I am supposed to do so. How can I ignore facts that I know are true, and even you say are true? How can one just brush things like this aside when it truly matters to them? How can anyone even DARE to be careless when they are around you? Every word, uttered or not. Every action, done or not. There's barely space to breathe. There's barely room for freedom of thought, of speech, of actions. There can only be freedom in things that you agree to. What about things that you don't? What about things that I don't?

It's tough to go on each day just waiting for the first negative response I get from you. I say "hey, look it's a t-rex going down that road!" You reply, "lame, boring. Dinosaurs do not exist." hypothetically of course. You call me weak, pathetic, just because I went online. You say I'm lame, boring, an idiot, stupid, easily amused. Yes, these titles may be true. In fact, they are most likely true. But no one likes to hear it daily. No one likes to be degraded, much less by the person they care about the most (next to themselves) in the world.

Enough about the bad attributes because despite all of that, I still crave for your approval. To find something, anything that you will not reply with "lame" or "boring" to. Also despite all of that, seeing you smile just makes my day. In fact, just being with you is already more solace than I can find anywhere else. But yet, the snail and the salt. I do wonder if this will kill me some day. Whether I am truly, just an idiot, being drawn to my own destruction by getting closer to you with each passing day. Putting so much of myself in the hands of a ruthless person who will more likely crush me than cherish me.

I admit, with each passing day, I become more distant. I am losing myself. I watch every word I speak, calculate everything I do. And the moment I don't, I screw up. You know what, even when I do, I still screw up. But regardless of everything, when I sit down and ask myself "is it worth it?" the answer never changes. The answer never changed.

Yes, you are worth all the side-stepping and the maddening scheming. You are worth all those horrible feelings of something eating away at your soul.You are worth another 100 years if time allows.

You know how some things just seem wrong no matter how you analyze it but at the same time, you heart keeps telling you "this is it. here, now. Here."? If I were not an idiot, I would've just stayed away. But now that we've decided to make it work, let's at least make it work for another 100 years.

With almost (because my memory is fail) everything said and done, there's still not a single flicker of doubt that crosses my mind when I say that I love you. In fact, I'll say it again.

I love you Ikhwan Tharwan.
Although you just drive me up the wall sometimes.

tyoriginal

Perpetual dilemmas.

2012-01-14T18:07:00.000+08:00

It's times like this that I can't wait to go home.
Just another 3 days. Patience.
It will arrive soon.

tyoriginal

Le sigh.

2012-01-13T00:50:00.001+08:00

Great night is great.
I'm still waiting for my answers.

tyoriginal

Being positive.

2012-01-10T19:00:00.000+08:00

It's not that hard to be happy, although every time you say something, someone shoots it down.
It's not that hard to be happy, although everything you do seems fruitless.
It's not that hard to be happy, although it seems as though everyone out there just wants to take advantage of you.
It's really not that hard to be happy, even though everything seems to be going the wrong way, even though you feel as though you have no control whatsoever in salvaging whatever that's left of yourself after a disaster.
It's not that hard to be happy. Just keep smiling, get some fresh air, and think happy thoughts.

It's amazing how we only see light in darkness, and how we only see joy in sadness.

tyoriginal

Of back pain and sagging breasts.

2012-01-10T05:38:00.001+08:00

You know what, after watching that video of a breast reduction surgery. I am TRAUMATIZED. I'll take back pain and sagging extremus any day T_T

tyoriginal

Guys and girls.

2012-01-09T15:44:00.001+08:00

Today, we receive news of a certain politician of our country being acquitted for a sodomy charge. Yesterday, we receive news of a victory of Manchester United against Manchester City. A few moments ago, a lady asked me what sorcery it was that I was filling in numbers in tiny boxes while tapping away on a calculator. Tomorrow, we may hear of strong winds and thunderstorms in various areas.

My facebook home page has never been more ablaze. People throwing out opinions after opinions about this and that. I'm glad I finally got my laundry done. An idiot keeps asking me why I'm not working although I've told him repeatedly that I'm still a bloody student. My exam paper was bullshit.

Did you know, opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one but no one wants to see another person's. To tell you the truth, politics, football, businesses, I really have no interest in these things. Let's start with politics. It's a man eat man world. This should be one's fundamental thought when we assess a situation where fight for power is involved. In politics, that is exactly what it is. A big scale, blown out of proportion fight for power.

I would respect you if you had worked hard for that authority over so many people. I would respect you more if you continued to perform after obtaining that authority. But politicians. Talk. Talk. Talk. Talk. Talk. They splash the tax payer's money on campaigns after campaigns to bring the other contenders down. And what's worse, their supporters. What do you get in return for supporting blindly such a person when you know that no person is perfect? No person upholds every single thing they say? The more you say, the less you are able to fulfill. And you tell me which politician is good at keeping his/her mouth shut for good.

Even worse than blind supporters, there are those who will go against ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. It's as though they live just to oppose. The opposition, the government, all politicians. All scums. If there were 1 politician in the world that did his/her job properly, there wouldn't be a need for politicians. It's not even a fair battle of who has the best intentions for the nation anymore. Now, what we're observing and experiencing is a bloody bitch fight on who can dig out more dirt about the other.

Frankly, even after typing all this, I don't think that my point has been sent across to whichever diehard opposer/supporter who is reading. Because like how I stated in the beginning of this post, opinions are like assholes. You won't see mine, I won't see yours. But that doesn't stop me from thinking that you're an idiot. I sometimes wish that we could all be nomads again, like back in the stone age. Govern your life as you will, not by a higher authority whose intentions are unclear.

To all of you who are bitching like your girlfriend just left you about the explosions after the verdict was given, or about the verdict itself, please do something more productive with your life. We're running out of intellect as it is. There's no need for people who don't know shit to dabble in things out of their control.

To end, I want to emphasize that this is just MY OPINION. Sorry for any hard feelings caused, but deep down inside, you know I'm right.

tyoriginal

I'm sorry, it was my fault.

2012-01-09T11:00:00.003+08:00

You know it is.

tyoriginal

Too comfortable, too fast?

2012-01-08T18:06:00.000+08:00

It's been... less than a month. But it feels like forever. We don't just finish each other's sentences, we say the same bloody things at the same bloody time. We talk for hours about things that no one would talk about, dancing around dangerous questions and striking when the other is most unprepared, laugh like kids who don't have a single worry, sleep like logs even when the sun is high up, continue the chatter, continue the fun.

It seems, we have entered the too-comfortable zone. Or not.

In the too-comfortable zone, there is security, routine, safety and comfort. Out of the too-comfortable zone, there is excitement, surprise and passion.

Sure we may seem boring to everyone else out there. They'll be wondering, what's so fun about just sitting and talking for hours on end at a dirty chinese coffee shop when you could go catch a movie or else, else, something. I don't know what couples do. But that's our form of entertainment. We spar, we debate, we argue about the stupidest things. At the end of the day, we'll just fall back into each other like it's the only right thing to do.

So are we too comfortable with each other? I think not. We're just weirdly synchronized. Most likely married for 100 years in our past life, too used to each other. But until the day we successfully perform telepathy, this can't be too much of a good thing.

tyoriginal

Know your limits

2012-01-07T04:41:00.000+08:00

Because that's your current best. Break them, move into the unknown, embrace chances, you'll be either at the very top or the very bottom in no time. What seperates the two is wisdom and luck.

This time I was lucky. Maybe not the next.

tyoriginal

Mish Mash.

2012-01-02T04:45:00.000+08:00

#1 I could never stay mad at you. :(

#2 Mass Transfer is a kill joy and I have to finish at least 2 chapters before I go swimming danggg. Looks like another sleepless night. Or no swimming. But I want to swim it's been WAY TOO LONGGG.

#3 The only (tiny) mirror I have is missing and my eyebrows look like crap gaaah mirror where did you go? Why did you leave me? Was I paying too much attention to Tail?

#4 Tail is such a darling! Gave me a smile and a hug while I was gonna curl up and curse the world. Damn monkey better be doing this out of sincerity and not the after-effects of all that crack he took.

#5 Is smug the portmanteau of smile and hug? (apparently NOT. I checked.)

#6 Repeating endlessly to myself that I do NOT need a new bag. Or new shoes. Or new clothes. Erghhh shoppaholic tendencies are resurfacing. And it's only the 2nd day of 2012!

#7 Note to self: CNY is coming soon anyway. Then you get to buy lotsa new stuff with the excuse that you can't wear old things during CNY! *dances around*

#8 Why does Pan Mee always taste so bloody good? Not that I'm eating it now, but still.

#9 I have this book by Edward Monkton as a Christmas gift with an awesome quote "and then she saw THE BEAUTIFUL SHOES and she knew that they were all she needed." BEST. CHRISTMAS. PRESENT. EVER!!! And must go get myself the remaining Edward Monkton books although they cost a bomb. (approx 20 pages book for $12.50. Dollar. I typed that right.)

#10 I'm too bummed to clean my room. It's just too messy and there's space to walk anyway! *already procrastinating though it's only the 2nd day of 2012*

#11 Do you believe in life after love? -Cher

#12 If cloud computing is the future, what happens when it rains?

#13 New Year celebration was strangely epic. Went to the (most probably) quietest club in town, paid a ridiculous amount for cover charge. Honestly, Rm50 for 1 mini glass of trashy cocktail and a kiddy party pack? And my blower thing wasn't even working properly! And I lost my whistle, which was my own damn fault but I still like to blame them for overcharging. And Rm127 for 1 tower of Tiger is frankly bullshit. How can you double your drinks price when you already charge for cover? And ALSO, you forced us to order the damn drinks erghhh. Forever boycott. But, there were fireworks. And for 2 minutes, nothing mattered. The sight of it all was breathtaking. Then it was back into the club wishing the aquarium would just explode and THEN at least there would be a new year's scene.

#14 I am craving for cake. Again. Crap.

#15 Has anyone ever survived swimming in an eddy current? Or surfing in one? Wait, can you surf on a current?

#16 Not in right state of mind. Too wound up. Need holiday. Beach. Sun. Sand. Live. Again.

Happy 2012 fellas!
tyoriginal

Wikipedia is hollywood biased.

2011-12-31T06:25:00.002+08:00

Film theory is the theory which states that mass/heat transfer across a film with unit thickness has 0 eddy mass transfer variables.

Film theory according to wikipedia is http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Film_theory

#facepalm
tyoriginal

How did we end up here?

2011-12-31T04:30:00.000+08:00

I tried uploading a cartoon coffee pic. But picasa ate it. Anyway, sorry about the lack of pictures lately. Been busy, been trying to be busy. Time for a good ol' post.

Cutting to the chase, I'm dating again. Regardless of all the pre-thought about obstacles and things that are just in the way, trying to prevent you from being happy, I realized one very important thing in the course of the past weeks. Life is too short to allow what other people think govern your decisions. At the end of the day, you have to prove to no one other than yourself that what you did was right, what you did not do was not to be regretted.

Am I afraid? Yes. Hell, yes. I have never been so afraid for a long, long time. But with every step I take, it gives me greater satisfaction than gaining an advantageous position in a predictable situation. I get worried. What if some day we realize that this doesn't work out? What if I'm still not capable of loving someone? What if I fuck up in the morning and that's it? But Indians, they are wise. They say "only time will tell."

So this is to a good year, 2011. And to a (hopefully) better one, 2012. A very belated merry christmas from me and Happy New Year folks!

tyoriginal

It's all fun and games to you isn't it?

2011-12-28T04:34:00.003+08:00

I have yet to see 1 concrete effort on your part.
Your intentions are still unclear.
If you're just fooling around, then get the fuck away from me.
If you're not, prove it.

tyoriginal

You're a goddamn drug.

2011-12-25T07:05:00.000+08:00

So horrible yet I keep coming back for more.
I would wish to be liberated but they say be careful what you wish for.

tyoriginal

It's Christmas.

2011-12-24T12:54:00.000+08:00

Take a step back, think about the people you cherish. How are they?
Merry Christmas to all you fellas.
This Christmas, it's gonna be just me, Tail, and a very stubborn person who refuses to take no as an answer.

tyoriginal

All I want for Christmas

2011-12-17T09:33:00.003+08:00

is for everyone to leave me the hell alone.

tyoriginal

So.....

2011-12-15T21:26:00.002+08:00

tired.

tyoriginal

Sense of accomplishment +INFINITY

2011-12-14T08:01:00.000+08:00

Finished all lab reporks.
Yesterday's quiz was a dupe.
Done studying for mass transfer.
Done group assignment and presentation.
Don't expect any problems during matlab test this friday.

Oh shit, tonight's semifinals and I haven't got shoes or belt or alter my dress. Can't be god~

tyoriginal

She took my MONEH!

2011-12-13T00:58:00.001+08:00

When I'm in need~ Keanu.

I've been through this more times than I like. Plagiarism of my work by others. I want to convince myself that this it's alright to let them do it. Because during the test they won't be able to answer anyway. But I am frankly getting quite sick of the selfishness of everyone. You want to copy my work, go ahead. When I want to just look at your work for reference, you refuse to even let me peek.

Take, take, take it all. Take all that I have.

Keep copying my ideas guys and girls. Enhance it, even. Because you didn't need to take the time to come up with the original idea. Because you didn't spend the time i spent poring over the problem. Because you like things easy and free. Because of that, you're going to get caught one day.

tyoriginal

There she goes again.

2011-12-12T02:30:00.001+08:00

At the strange hour of 2.25am, I am craving for a good cheesecake.

You must understand that I'm doing this just so that I'm not the only one who wants cheesecake. :) Sharing is caring! NOW GO OM NOM NOM NOM

tyoriginal

Sweet nuts.

2011-12-10T06:14:00.001+08:00

I might be going bonkers.

So Fred baby, you think she's a phony? Paul baby, not Fred baby. And why, what, NO! *laughs* You're wrong. and right at the same time. She's a phony! But she's an original phony!

Breakfast at Tiffany's. Breathe. Now get your ass back to work bitch.

tyoriginal

Don't debate with yourself.

2011-12-08T06:20:00.001+08:00

The moment I stop to think is the moment I start panicking. What if? What if? Fuck this shit. Just done with 1 test yesterday. Read: Test. 3 marks. Semester's almost ending, first test. 3 marks. I don't know whether I should be pissed cos I studied 2 nights as he said it's a mid-term paper, or whether I should be afraid because if this is 3 marks, where's the other 47 marks? Next week? Tomorrow?

And then, just when you think YES. No more exams until finals. Next monday, 5% quiz; wednesday, 20% test. Let me start with today: 11am tutorial, just uploaded. 2pm yesterday's test questions due as an assignment. Tomorrow, how's the front on the presentation you bunch of monkeys who expect me to finish everything? Saturday, oh thank god I still have Saturdays free. Sunday: rehearsal. Monday: quiz. Tuesday: quiz. Wednesday: test, semifinals.

If I had a hologram machine, I'd love to create a giant hologram of a middle finger and make it the new landmark in uni.

tyoriginal

I'm gonna start a fight.

2011-12-07T04:33:00.001+08:00

Pink's "So What?!" remains one of my important anthems. Anyhow, enough about that. Trivial matters, no point crying over spilled milk.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

AH. I have been hard at work trying to figure out the different types of operational amplifiers (Op-Amp). And it's still bugging the hell out of me because they all look bloody similar, but they are not the same. No time for chit-chat. I've gotta continue my brain workout.

And the lesson of the day is, egoism is ruling the world. Think about it. Especially since the advent of social medias, the 'what's in it for me? (WiiFM)' agenda has been holding top priority in an ever expanding amount of the masses.

tyoriginal

What the...

2011-12-06T06:25:00.001+08:00

I have been so hardworking! How come there's still 2 assignments and 3 reports not started in my task manager? Celaka!!! Itu lah. I like working with people who carry their weight when it comes to group work. But lately, it seems like everyone just can't be bothered any more. And then who's going to do their work? The person who most desperately wants an A.

While it may sound like complete bullshit to many (just remove their names from the cover la!), marks are given for team work. And when they can't answer the questions posed, then who's going to take the hit? That's right. The entire group. Tired as I am, there's still a mountain of work to be done. At least it's not as bad as last week's 4 assignments and 3 reports. Mind you, over the week, I have completed 3 assignments and 2 reports. But they just keep coming, don't they? Especially when you don't want any more of these little buggers to appear. :(

Now, I have to go study for Wednesday's over-delayed mid-term. *sighs*

tyoriginal

It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside.

2011-12-03T19:10:00.001+08:00

You know how everyone out there's constantly searching for 'the one'? You look around you and you see couples who are happily married. Maybe just married, maybe for 30 years, maybe for 50 years, but still happy. And then you think "when am I going to find someone like that who's willing to stick with me through thick and thin and a simple smile on that person's face will be able to light up my day?".

Think about it the other way. You look around you and you notice those people in the background that you've never paid much attention to before. They are alone. In their prime, past their prime, yet still alone. Have you ever thought that maybe not everyone is destined to have someone out there for them? And then you think "am I going to end up alone for the rest of my life?"

There's no confirmed answer. After all, who knows what the future holds? Who knows if those people who are happily together are really meant for each other or just trying hard day-by-day to keep their relationship together? Who knows if those people who are alone are actually not meant to be alone but they missed that one vital opportunity due to certain circumstances?

My thoughts on this matter? It's the glass of milk again. If you're an optimist, go for the former. And if you're a pessimist, go for the latter. But at the end of the day, we know that 50% of the glass contains milk. Therefore you will never know what the answer really is. Just like the tossing of a coin. Heads or tails? Would you say that heads is better than tails? Or otherwise? Certainly not, because we know that whatever will be, will be. The same thing applies in this matter.

However, hollywood has set a standard (an illogical one) to all relationships out there. Forcing us to have this mental picture of how a perfect relationship is like and resulting in us never being happy with anyone that we're with because they are not Hugh Jackman. It contributed to us not knowing when enough is enough and made us forget how to appreciate another person instead of just wanting more all the time. It made us greedy, selfish, self-centered and never satisfied.

Let's face it. Who wouldn't want a fairy tale-esque relationship like that portrayed in The Notebook? Or even P.S. I Love You. The problem with wanting that is, we'll never get it. Humans are not perfect, whereas fiction can be perfect. More often than not, we forget that we ourselves are humans too. We nitpick at others' flaws and shortcomings but refuse to see the giant elephant in front of us.

By now, if you're still reading, you're probably wondering "what the hell is this crazed woman trying to convey by writing all this?". Well I'll get straight to the point. I'm sick of seeing heartbroken status updates, sick of hearing people getting together and proclaiming to the world "this is it! I've found THE ONE." and then break up just a few weeks later due to "irreconcilable differences". My point is, live and let live. Come what may. Whether you will find that person, whether that person even exists, that's a question no one but time can answer. So why fret about it? People in the past who've left us crushed and broken and took a part of us with them when they left our lives, learn from them. Learn not to do that to others. You've been there, done that, it doesn't feel great. So what if you get hurt again? What's pleasure without hurt? What's love without hate? What's happiness without sadness?

I believe in the circle of life. You should too.

tyoriginal

Trust him, he was an "engineer".

2011-12-01T17:05:00.001+08:00

I happen to bumble into class today. Reluctantly too, because classes these days are only for discussing tutorial questions and I have a very hardworking senior who provides me with all the answers I need. And there's this certain lecturer who enjoys *sharing* his expertise with us. Today, he asked, "why do people who don't have a high education background seem to earn more than those who have ample knowledge in their field of expertise?"

And proceeds to explain that Power = Work / Time. Since Time is Money, and Knowledge is Power, we can change the equation to an equivalent form which is Knowledge = Work / Money. Or Money = Work / Knowledge. Thus meaning that Knowledge is inversely proportional to Money. In layman's terms, the more knowledge you have, the less more you have. Or the less knowledge you have, the more money you'll have.

Interestingly, a few years back, there's a similar equation that ends with Girls = Evil. Starting with Girls = Time x Money, and since Time is Money, we have Girls = Money X Money. Since Money is the root of all evil, Girls = Evil.

Before typing all that out, I was thinking to myself. Man, these people sure have a lot of time on their hands coming up with these ridiculous equations. And after typing all that out, I realize I too seem like I have a lot of time on my hands LOL. Which I honestly don't. But for the sake of keeping this blog alive, you'll just have to put up with my nerd engineer post. :(

tyoriginal

Sometimes...

2011-11-29T04:46:00.001+08:00

I wish matlab was a living thing. Just so that I can STRANGLE THE HELL OUT OF THIS STUPID SOFTWARE AGHHHHH. WHY U NO WORK WHEN I WANT YOU TO WORK?!

For the past 5 hours. Tweaking and redoing 3 different codes. Same. Disappointing. Results. Matlab: Busy. For fuck's sake you're a software! If there's an error, tell me where the error is. Don't just be indefinitely busy and make me force quit this damn thing and when I run you again, you just give me the busy sign as though it's the convenient finger.

*deep breaths* I should really give myself a pat on the back for putting up with this shit for the past 5 hours. And only god knows how many hours before today. PATIENCE, it is running low.

WAGING A WAR AGAINST MATLAB
tyoriginal

El momento de la epiphany.

2011-11-26T15:25:00.001+08:00

It all makes sense now. We are different. Not the same. Dissimilar. Birds of a different feather. That's why I can't understand what the hell you people are thinking half the time. For a moment there, I thought I was the one with a problem. But what a relief, no, it isn't me with the problem. #epiphany.

Okay, enough about that. What have I been doing for the past few days? Locking myself up in my room and reading the Alex Rider series as though my life depended on it, and neglecting assignments and reports like they don't mean a thing. :D

I'm currently at the end of the 4th book - Eagle Strike. Sure hope I finish them as soon as possible, or else I'll never start with my work.

Bookworm mode: ON.
tyoriginal

Semifinalist baby!

2011-11-24T03:17:00.001+08:00

After a gruelling 100 minutes worth of makeup removal, which I'm not even sure if I got all of them. Where the normal makeup remover didn't even remove 1% of the makeup, and almost 10% of my eye & lips makeup remover has been used up. I finally has normal face again. I'm not even going to start on my hair.

Oh, and I'm advancing to the next round! Happy that I made it, yet freaking out about another long-ass rehearsal session and MORE COMPETITORS. But all in all, thanks to my everlasting supporters, managers, stylists and advisors, without which I would have never come this far. I'll try my best for the next round.

tyoriginal

Desperation is ugly.

2011-11-22T18:31:00.001+08:00

Don't believe me? Watch the walking dead. Or have someone who's desperate beg you for something. Anyhow, all physical preparations are done and the only thing that's left is mental preparation, which I seem to be having a problem with... YEA RIGHT. XD

I am awesome. Who the hell am I trying to kid! :D See you folks tomorrow after the competition.

tyoriginal

My reading speed... is no longer superior.

2011-11-22T06:30:00.001+08:00

So I was reading Stormbreaker, the first book in the Alex Rider series. It's a teenage novel, and it took me 2 sessions to complete. It's a good read but why I now no pro read book! Ergh.

There's a lot of things waiting to be done. Just when I thought "finally, assignments and tests are over!", came a case study, 3 group assignments (1 of them which I have no idea what group I'm in), lab reports as usual and multiple presentations. I are stress. Would upload pics but I keep forgetting to buy a new microSD for my phone, or fix my specs (one of the plastic rests in the middle disappeared), or eat, or sleep. I look even more like a zombie now compared to Sunday and competition is tomorrow lololololol.

Que sera, sera.

tyoriginal

I'm kinda friggin tired.

2011-11-20T18:44:00.001+08:00

When someone says rehearsal, what do you expect? Well, on my part I expected "lalaladilalala it's just a tiny briefing and a short practice about where to walk and stand lalaladilalalala". And then, would you know it we were supposed to bring our heels, put on full makeup complete with hairdo, which is what almost all the other girls did except... me, and about 2 others?

The worst part was, at the end of rehearsal, there was a photoshoot session for the photogenic category. AGHHH I WAS LOOKING LIKE A ZOMBIE. Bare face, hair not done, wearing only t-shirt and shorts. T__T But the photographer said my smize is good. Which I can only hope made me look less like a zombie wtf. Twas depressing. But anyway, here's my favourite pic from Saturday's shoot. There are more pics but I haven't gotten them.

LOL. Doesn't look like me kan? Good shoot is good.

tyoriginal

Just a coupla expressionist marshmallows.

2011-11-19T21:01:00.001+08:00

Which you will never eat because they are way too cute. Shoot went well, thanks to my managers, stylists and advisors. Pics soon? I hope.

That's all for today. Gonna be helluva week. Good luck folks.

tyoriginal

So I don't have your support.

2011-11-19T03:29:00.001+08:00

It's kinda sad but at the same time, it's alright, who needs your support anyway.

tyoriginal

Wants and needs. You should NEVER confuse them.

2011-11-18T05:24:00.001+08:00

I logged onto facebook, someone gets a new phone, a new car, a new soul, a new ass. When asked why, they always reply "oh I really need it. You don't understand how it is!" Phone, telecommunication. I'm pretty sure you have a phone. What's faulty about the old one? Is it not working any more? Has it malfunctioned? Car, transportation. Do you really not have access to any form of transportation at all? Where do you need to go so badly that you have to buy a car? Isn't there ample public transportation around? Do you think it's wise to spend your parents' hard earned money on something that you claim to need but in reality is just something that you want?

I was like that once. Dissatisfied about being sent to Sabah for my studies, I demanded everything I could from my parents. A vacation, my car to be shipped over etc. But you over there who's saying you need this and that don't understand the pain that stabs my very core each time I go home and see them looking older and more fragile. Well, I can't really tell you to stop exploiting them like a money tree, that's for you to decide.

I miss home. I cannot believe the last time I was back I was too sick to leave my room. I can't believe I wasted all my time in those 4 walls I made a sanctuary of for the past 22 years. It's sad isn't it? You don't miss the water till it's gone. And when it's gone, what do you do?

tyoriginal

Back again, naturally.

2011-11-16T07:18:00.004+08:00

Hello readers, if I have any left. After a 6 months hiatus (I am really sorry about that but too many things have happened and they are better left in the past than brought up again), I finally find time to blog again. How have you been? :D

Just a quick recap of the past 6 months, 4 months were spent in KL, doing absolutely nothing other than working in a death-trap of a factory which was quite fun. 2 months I am back in KK going through the 5th semester (out of 8!) of my studies. I have recently gotten quite very sick, until the point where I had to take painkillers to walk but thank the gods the right diagnostic was finally given and I can walk again!

In the past 6 months, I have traveled to Penang, Jakarta, Genting, and Sandakan. Dated a few different people. Enjoyed my life a little bit differently. Made some new friends, lost some old ones. This is a new chapter, I suppose.

In terms of what I have done with my life in the past 6 months, I have learn how to be a better daughter, a better friend, a better team leader, a better person in general. Work has been overwhelming, what with the convocation in less than a month's time and the end of the semester drawing near. But all's well now. I did my part, everyone else did theirs, we can finally focus on the future, and I finally have time to take a breather from the madness that transpired in the last 6 months.

You can trust me when I say it hasn't all died down yet. There's still a lot of unfinished business, and I'm sorry for being so vague but that's why I made my blog private in the first place. I actually considered the option of deleting this blog altogether but too many memories has been put in here. This blog is too fond to me to just disregard like a clothe that does not fit anymore.

Alas, I shall stop my jabbering because guys and girls, it is time to print my sweet sweet labour of work (assignments and lab reports) and then go get my pan mee fix. It's good to be back.

tyoriginal

Priorities, woman!

2011-04-08T07:47:00.001+08:00

Ergh. Spent the last 12 hours studying my ass off for a:

-2% thermo quiz

-1% russian quiz

asaiadugeiyfgs this reality just hit me. I feel like an idiot now. And a sleepy idiot too. DAMNIT

tyoriginal

It's 1.30am for goodness' sake.

2011-04-07T01:36:00.001+08:00

Note the title, note the time. And here, I'm getting my 2nd lecture on Intellectual Property in this semester. Yeahoo! I WANT TO SLEEP LAH.

tyoriginal

Oh?

2011-04-04T01:55:00.003+08:00

Anyone see anything wrong with this picture?

Wait, let me circle it with a bright red border. Better?

My CSI lab may have entered an alternate reality, or outer space (low gravity geddit? ahahaha)! Apasal the desktop that I've paid 50k for is lopsided?! On the bright side, Case Set 8 is out already, in case you don't know that yet.

Ho hum. I'm in a amiable mood now. Retrieved my charger from the car when the rain slowed down to a slight drizzle a moment ago, not it's back to hailstorm tornado boom boom rain. The kind that Sabah is extremely proud of :D Ahh, it's time to sleep but I'm still wide awake. I'll talk about the dinner.

From left: The protocol head that I want to kill, Dr Anis, Prof PoPo, Dr Chu, Dr Siva, myself

Aren't confetti poppers awesome? Heheheh! I don't has much pictahs I don't know why my batch isn't hardworking this time around. Maybe cos they were too busy running around to take photos. But from the picture alone, you can see that everything is awesome and I still want to kill the protocol head. arghh. Control your rage woman. As long as everyone had fun right?

EXACTLY.

Now imma try to sleep.

tyoriginal

asjdggeakjs

2011-04-04T00:54:00.002+08:00

All day, all I wanted was for it to rain. And now, it's a downpour! But right after being happy for about 5 seconds, I realized I left my phone's charger in the car T_T

TSING YIE, Y U NO SEDIAKAN PAYUNG SEBELUM HUJAN???

sigh. so fail. But on the bright side, it's raining! It's finally raining! :D

tyoriginal

NAILED IT.

2011-04-03T11:00:00.002+08:00

2nd of April totally nailed it. I have too many people to thank. So I'll just sum it up to a huge ass THANK YOU EVERYBODY!

Now that I'm more awake (compared to the zombie state I was in yesterday), paying 500 for the band was worth every single cent, paying 118 for Prof's meal wasn't really worth it but he told me I'll have a bright future, and all I could think about was my 118. Renting the walkie talkies was the best idea I've ever had, bulldozing my way through the opening ceremony with confetti cannons is something i have not any ounce of regret doing, but not killing the protocol head was something I regretted not doing (more about this when the afterglow is gone).

I admire Chung Fui for his guts and creativity, without him, the programme would not have been so interesting, Scott for making it there despite the odds and getting straight to work, Ase for being so meticulous in every detail, Chee Siang for being the best treasurer ever, Ling Sang and Ricky for being my walking talking event details dictionary, but Simon is still a wuss.

After party was amazing. Then again, it's me and alcohol. We be lethal combination.

tyoriginal

Oh noes.

2011-04-02T01:02:00.002+08:00

Hello facebook. And hello my crazy 2nd of April. You're finally here, at long last. After days and weeks of planning you have arrived, in all your glory. Now, dear 2nd of April, I pray that you'll not let me down. I have great expectations for you, and I would love it if you lived up to those expectations. Bless us all, bless you too. You have just begun, and I will be watching you all the way to your last second.

May our partnership go excellently, dear 2nd April 2011.

tyoriginal

If I die young

2011-03-31T18:58:00.001+08:00

Let's say, tomorrow. I want to let the world know that I died from imploding and you can find pieces of my corpse around Kingfisher in KK.

Kthxbai.

tyoriginal

Spoils.

2011-03-30T21:57:00.003+08:00

Cutting to the chase (because I want to distract you from the lack of pictures), apparently Shills is a very well known Taiwanese brand and Skinlite is a very well known Korean brand. wtf. I feel kinda fail now.

Anyhow, the mask from Skinlite is pretty damn awesome. Smells awesome, feels awesome. One thing though, the contents of the package were wayyy too much to fit onto my face! Which makes me wonder, do korean people have huge faces?

Hmm, anyway next, I tried the peel-off mask from Shills. It's supposed to work as a black/white head remover thing only it comes in a bottle and after exposed to air for some time, the gel kinda hardens and then u get to yank it off your face. It was alright, it works la but not as well as the Biore one I was using before this. However, this one gives you the chance to choose where you want to apply the gel and saves you a lot of money from buying different stickers for different parts of your face. Smells funky, looks funky, effectiveness I'll give it a 7/10, convenience 10/10.

Usually I wouldn't give two craps about whether my face feels good after a layer of fine hair follicles were yanked off it but since I have this mini bottle of soothing concentrate, might as well try right? It smelled nice, but it left my face feeling a tad bit sticky. Which I hate. I rather have my face hurting from rawness than feeling sticky. Uhh, promptly washed it off and there's probably 2.99ml left in the bottle from the original 3ml :D Anyone wants? I be giving it away lah.

Money well spent?

tyoriginal

Hello miss, we have a free skin test!

2011-03-30T19:39:00.004+08:00

RE-UPDATE:

ZOMG ok here's what happened. After blogging, I decided that I shall use those things I bought at least once to prove my blogpost wrong. Aiyah read the next post la it's too long for an update.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

UPDATE:

Haiya now I damn regret I didn't buy the saline solution thingamajig blah. Totally conned! And I also regret not buying the Skinlite's aloe vera body lotion it's so good! I played with the tester [not just] a bit and usually lotions leave you with that sticky feeling right, my arms are so smooth and there's not even the slightest hint of oiliness T_T Plus, it smells amazing wtf.

Oh ya, before I get distracted by what I regretted not buying, what shoes should I wear?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Ladies, NEVER, EVER take a free skin test from a cosmetic shop. It will subsequently make you feel that your skin is shit and therefore result in spending tons of cash on things you'll probably never use.

For me, it was RM88.60. T_T

I went in to restock on my foundation and they tricked me into the skin test! Dahlah my skin looks like crap now cos of the sunburn but it totally worked conning me into buying some few million packets of Skinlite's aloe vera face mask and Shills' purifying peel-off mask. wtf right. After RM88.60, they threw in a miniscule bottle of soothing cream (3ml wtf) but it was Methode Swiss so I don't know.

And that wasn't all. We also went to Guardian because I can finally has Maybelline super duper powderful mascara *gloat* that's when we saw Liese bubble hair color. Why are we such sluts for pretty packages I don't know haiz. But anyway, we bought the one in Chiffon Beige and will be trying it out tomorrow. Hopefully it works, or else it will be another RM120 to go to the saloon and redo the colour wtf.

Oh yea, you would think that's all. I also got sheer stockings to pretend that my leg isn't two-toned. But after I got them stockings, I decided I need a clincher too. And there it was, so pretty with the silver leaf/flower thing in the middle OMG I knew I had to get it T_T RM30 gone. Aghhh.

Right, Tsing should know better than to keep looking at other stuff right? That was when I walked past an optician shop. No, I didn't get new specs thank goodness. But what I did get was contact lenses. This is the ultimate wtf because I swore to myself that I will never one day be so vain as to get contact lenses T_T But I was in the mood to spend! How could you blame me? And they didn't want to give me a free casing, so I bought one.

Well, I'm very very satisfied, but I'm also very, very broke. That's easily RM300 on crap I'd probably never use. Irony time, guess how much my lunch cost? Ahahaha this is too epic. RM3.

TIGA RINGGIT!!!

tyoriginal

RM5 for 2 Big Breakfast sets?

2011-03-30T06:39:00.002+08:00

3 words, NOT WORTH IT.

1 whole hour of queuing and cursing while your stomach is spasming in gastric pains because YOU NEED FOOD, and YOU NEED FOOD NOW. Then finally it's your turn and the cashier is a lazy bastard who takes your order rudely, then you find out there's no fork and knife for your hot cakes and when you ask the counter for them they ask you to eat it with a sundae spoon (which also ran out) then he reluctantly passes you a porridge spoon to eat your hotcakes with.

And the big breakfast set? The 2 free sets? Holy moles IT TASTED LIKE CAT! Not that I know what cats taste like but I imagine that they are not delicious. Verdict, it was a total waste of my 1 hour queuing and another 1 hour trying to swallow the crap they call food. I didn't even touch the 2nd free set and donated it to Russell instead (no worries, no food was wasted, Russ is a glutton).

I kept telling myself, it's only 5 bucks! What do you expect? Honestly, plenty. McDonald's is an established international fast food chain, so they should at least have some standards, be it in their food or their customer service (in this case, BOTH!). If you cannot afford to provide such a promotion, then why did you launch it in the first place?

Well, for those of you who still have not gave this atrocity a try, tomorrow (March 31st) is the last day of the promotion. Knock yourself out.

tyoriginal

She was so sad.

2011-03-29T01:48:00.004+08:00

I spoke to a girl today. She was so afraid, so sad, so lonely and so frustrated at everything that's going on right now. At first sight, one would think that I've finally found someone who can relate to what I'm going through. It should have been a victory punch in the air for me to finally find someone that can understand me well enough to be my friend.

But after a long chat, I realized that I don't feel happy at all that I've found someone equally afraid and sad, not to mention frustrated at so many things that aren't going right at the same time. In fact, I felt sad for her. Sad for us, that we were forced to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, left with nothing but to cope however we can with this seemingly impossible situation.

Do you know how it feels like to realize that you've lost everything you once loved or cherished? Do you know how it feels like to feel so helpless in a situation where no way out is in sight? It's scary. Truly nerve wrecking. Especially when it happens in a blink of an eye. We all go through periods of loneliness at different points in our lives. But when loneliness is a constant thing, something you wake up to every morning, something that follows you around throughout the day, something that tortures your mind at night that you cannot sleep, something that even haunts you in your dreams, you realize that there is really no escape from it.

People aren't willing to take in a new member in a society. It's always about the cliques, always about the background, always about something. If you're different, you'll always be different. Nobody cares how you feel, nobody wants to be "burdened" by your problems. Society obeys the law of inertia too - that is, a resistance to change. So what happens then when you become the "outsider"? That's right, nothing happens. You're stuck there. Maybe temporarily until you go back to familiar places, maybe forever if you don't find a way to cope with it.

It's truly saddening to see this happen to someone so close to me. I could really relate to her, she was crying, so heartbroken. She told herself that there's no other way to get out of that situation other than her leaving altogether. Anyone would've disagreed with her, but I didn't. That's what I thought too, some time ago. If nobody wants you to be a part of their lives, why bother? If everyone only wants to use you? Why bother? Just leave. See them pick up the pieces of what you left behind and maybe, some day, they will realize how important you were as a part of that society.

But of course, we don't have much of a choice. We can leave, but where would we go? We could quit, just go home into the loving embrace of people we love. But what would that say about us? It's really frustrating and I cannot stress this enough. There is nothing a lone person can do. This is why everyone should learn to value those who helped them. Regardless of whether you approve of their behaviour, of their lifestyle, of the way they dress. It's petty, when you think about it. So what if you don't agree with everything they decide to do? A good deed is a good deed. And why should you judge them on how they decide to carry themselves? For all we know, normal is just a world used to describe the majority. So if the majority of a society goes around wielding guns and killing children will that be normal too?

Have a little tolerance, have a little patience. Don't be quick to judge, don't be quick to point fingers. There's really no use in alienating someone. Just think about what it would be like if you were the one being alienated. Of course, there's always the counter argument of you not being like said person and hence will never be alienated. However, your actions and words to this person has proved you otherwise. Sure, she could be meticulous at times, even to the point of being troublesome. Sure, she could have a lot to say about a lot of things, but do you think you're devoid of flaws?

In cases like this, I'm always left speechless.

tyoriginal

Chip n' Dale + Donald Duck

2011-03-28T21:54:00.002+08:00

What's not to love? Ahhh. We 90's kids had an awesome childhood *smug* You kids nowadays get stuck with Hannah Montana and the likes of it while we had Mickey Mouse and Friends, Dexter's Laboratory, Magdalene OMG SO MANY T_T

Watched it yet?

Applecore~
Baltimore~
Who's your friend?
HIM!
*THWACK!*
Not no more. :D

WAY TOO AWESOME AHAHAHA!!!!

tyoriginal

A real update

2011-03-28T08:37:00.003+08:00

Today, I will do a proper post to make up for all the half thought out nonsense that I've been throwing at you guys for the past 1 week (so sorry!). Anyway, just so you know, JELLY means jealous. It's an internet meme thing. The other day I was talking to JW about Thermo and me being a mad genius and everyone subsequently wanting to kill me (or throw me into the ocean, same difference yo).

So he was saying, if they jelly, then tell them "IMMA EAT YOU WITH A SPOON!" LMAO! Totally cracked me up! Oh btw, JW means Jalleh Wong, meaning Jew Dan, meaning Jew Boy etc. The name JW began a few weeks ago. We all know that Daniel [not so] secretly wants to be chinese. He even has a chinese name for himself - Wong Jia Pet. I know right, it sounds ridiculous. At least pick a name that makes sense la aduhai. Anyhow, he was saying he's tired of DJ cos it's so mainstream then decided that he shall from then on be known as Daniel Wong. But wtf there are even more Daniel Wong's out there compared to DJ! Hence, Jalleh Wong. Besides, the initials could mean Johnnie Walker!

Oh and I absolutely love JW Black Label (maybe because I've never had the opportunity to try the famed Blue Label before). It's my go-to scotch whisky for any occasion.

Anyhow, the Dean is attending this saturday's Appre Nite. Oh god I AM HYPERVENTILATING. Y U NO ABSENT??? Just like that, everything is tuned up a notch. I jump at every SMS thinking he'd be asking for something that I can't possibly provide sigh. And not just that, I have a strange history with the Dean. He likes to give me pop quizzes. The last time I saw him he asked me for Newton's 2nd law wtf. I can just imagine the 4 whole hours I'll be sitting there and him barraging me with a ton of questions that I might/might not be able to answer aghhh.

Anyhow, it's in 5 days and I pray and pray that everything will be alright. Please let it be alright or else I'll have to start attacking people with a baseball bat and trust me, that isn't a pretty sight. But my motto still stands "There isn't a problem that a baseball bat can't solve." I'm copyrighting this. You people better quote me if you are ever going to use that line LOL!

Oh another thing, next Saturday which is the Annual Dinner for the Engineering faculty, I'll be performing. Wait, that's not what it is. I'll be PAID to perform :D Yeahoo! Problem is, I can't exactly sing in the original pitch of the song. VOICE, Y U NO SOPRANO? T_T The woes of an Alto. Damnit. And my duet partner (I hope he doesn't forget the lyrics this time) is a Tenor, which means that we both will be singing notes from the same octave which is bloody hillarious and fail at the same time.

Anyhow, I just hope that everything will go as planned. Or rather, surprises will be delightful instead of disastrous. Must go meditate now to calm self down.

How was your week?

tyoriginal

Wardrobe dilemma :(

2011-03-27T16:17:00.002+08:00

Next week is Appre Night, and yesterday's rendezvous at the beach has left my face, arms and feet 5 shades darker than the rest of my body. So I'm thinking, dress or leggings?

If it's a dress, it has to be a longggg dress. You know, to steer eyes away from my two-toned legs. Or rather, I could just go with leggings but the problem is, I don't has a pair of leggings and it might just be too casual. Mehhh!

This sucks. I shall now go play PvZ because it requires less brain work.

tyoriginal

Overachiever bitch.

2011-03-26T00:18:00.002+08:00

Oh that's me. So it turns out, I might be a real mad genius after all. There is a 12% gap between my carry marks with the next person in line. I should be happy right? But no, there's a difference between winning and being full of WIN.

Placing 2nd in the Academic Quiz was something I was proud of. Despite all the odds, we did it. But something that requires so little effort? Just one night of studying? And everyone else did badly while wondering what sort of dirty tricks you pulled to get that grade? How could the person with the worst attendance be the top scorer? That doesn't make me proud.

I wrote my scholarship essay today thinking about all those times I really felt good about winning something. It turns out, all the times I won alone was not as satisfying as winning something as a group i.e. choir, chess.

I like reading prefaces and acknowledgements in books. In fact, they are usually my favourite part of the books. See, if you did something without anyone's help, there's no glory in it. It's all yours. No one really cares. But if everyone contributed, the glory of winning could be shared among all who contributed and that is what I really want.

OK finish reading the above yet? That's how much of an overachiever I am. So much that I am an over-over achiever. D: Btw, annual dinner is in a week. Am scared out of my wits that something might go wrong.

tyoriginal

Limbo wtf.

2011-03-25T02:34:00.002+08:00

UPDATE:

It's now 3.50am, I have finally finished the damn assignment. Perhaps God heard my plea? Nah. Believers will believe. But my back ache and throbbing head and shaking hands say it was pure hard work.

But still, it might have been some divine power's intervention.

------------------------------------------------------------------

I swear I'm in limbo. It's been 12 hours since 2pm and I still can't finish the bloody assignment! What is wrong with me??!!! OH GODDD. And why is McD freezing like a blast freezer? Bejeezus!

On the bright side, oh wait, there is NO bright side! Even my refillable hot coffee becomes cold in 5 minutes. DAMNIT DAMNIT DAMNIT. My hands are shaking and my eyes are tearing for christ's sake get me out of limbo!

GOD, if you exist, please at least help me on this.

tyoriginal

Epiphany moment!!!

2011-03-24T20:34:00.002+08:00

I found out why I can't get past the 6th sentence. It *is* due to the plagiarizing scare last Friday! Now I can't do my assignment without being paranoid about my lecturer accusing me of plagiarism again holy hell. WTF. STOP PSYCHO-ING YOURSELF!

But the good news is, I finally finished Introduction *AND* Objectives. Oh god finally! Page 1 completed! Now just to fill the other compulsory 4 pages Lordy help me. My reference materials are somewhat useless and wikipedia only helps *that* much. Aghhhh whyyyy! I was never meant to be an Electric & Electronic Engineer :( Thank goodness this isn't my major. Or else TY = die.

Ok, gotta get back to work and trying not to psycho myself too much,

tyoriginal

BOO-HOO.

2011-03-24T18:42:00.002+08:00

Alarm rang at 7am, and I turned it off, and then subsequently dreamt that I went for class and all that jazz just to wake up at 10.30am to realize that the only part that really happened was when I turned off my alarm.

Then, I picked up Azhar and we headed to Inanam for the best Nasi Ambak evaarrr. It's cheap, and it's tasty. Ok, whoever's coming to KK I'm bringing you there.

After that, went back to the faculty to wait for the treasurer to pass me the deposit money. The boredom of waiting was diminished by watching HIMYM. :D

At 2pm, I went back home and continued working on my assignment. 5 sentences later, it was 3pm. ZOMG HOW DID THAT HAPPEN??? So I went back to the faculty (again damnit) to pick Russell up and then head to Shang.

On the way to Shang, we ran into a damn cop. Who pulled me over and gave me a summon (yes, this is the 3rd one. 1st one for not wearing my seat belt, 2nd one for the roundabout accident and this one also for not wearing my seatbelt) I SWEAR I WAS JUST GONNA WEAR IT but they pulled me over first. Bahhh. Not even a road block. I is sad.

But then we arrived at Shang! Shang is such a beautiful place. It's not worth it staying anywhere else in KK if you can afford Shang like srsly (shameless advertising). But, they have this new *theme park* area which includes a giant bucket of doom!

That's what a giant bucket of doom looks like!!! Super excited! I wanna stay there forever T_T

After going over the contract a million times, the events manager took Russ and I to view the function space. Which was awesome. And then she also showed us how the deco will look like on the day itself zomg so pretty! I've gotta say, I'm really glad she's in charge of my event. Without her I'm plenty much doomed.

Anyhow, after a lonnggggg chat, we finally paid the deposit and returned back to Kingfisher. And now I have to continue with my 6th sentence.

tyoriginal

Childlike faith.

2011-03-23T20:49:00.005+08:00

Stumbled upon this poem today:

Daddy's Day

Her hair was up in a pony tail,
her favorite dress tied with a bow.
Today was Daddy's Day at school,
and she couldn't wait to go.
But her mommy tried to tell her,
that she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand,
if she went to school alone.
But she was not afraid;
she knew just what to say.
What to tell her classmates
of why he wasn't there today.
But still her mother worried,
for her to face this day alone.
And that was why once again,
she tried to keep her daughter home.
But the little girl went to school
eager to tell them all.
About a dad she never sees
a dad who never calls.
There were daddies along the wall in back,
for everyone to meet.
Children squirming impatiently,
anxious in their seats
One by one the teacher called
a student from the class.
To introduce their daddy,
as seconds slowly passed.
At last the teacher called her name,
every child turned to stare.
Each of them was searching,
a man who wasn't there.
"Where's her daddy at?"
she heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one,"
another student dared to shout.
And from somewhere near the back,
she heard a daddy say,
"Looks like another deadbeat dad,
too busy to waste his day."
The words did not offend her,
as she smiled up at her Mom.
And looked back at her teacher,
who told her to go on.
And with hands behind her back,
slowly she began to speak.
And out from the mouth of a child,
came words incredibly unique.
"My Daddy couldn't be here,
because he lives so far away.
But I know he wishes he could be,
since this is such a special day.
And though you cannot meet him,
I wanted you to know.
All about my daddy,
and how much he loves me so.
He loved to tell me stories
he taught me to ride my bike.
He surprised me with pink roses,
and taught me to fly a kite.
We used to share fudge sundaes,
and ice cream in a cone
And though you cannot see him.
I'm not standing here alone.
"Cause my daddy's always with me,
even though we are apart
I know because he told me,
he'll forever be in my heart"
With that, her little hand reached up,
and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat,
beneath her favorite dress.
And from somewhere here in the crowd of dads,
her mother stood in tears.
Proudly watching her daughter,
who was wise beyond her years.
For she stood up for the love
of a man not in her life.
Doing what was best for her,
doing what was right.
And when she dropped her hand back down,
staring straight into the crowd.
She finished with a voice so soft,
but its message clear and loud.
"I love my daddy very much,
he's my shining star.
And if he could, he'd be here,
but heaven's just too far.
You see he was a policeman
and died just this past year
When airplanes hit the towers
and taught Americans to fear.
But sometimes when I close my eyes,
it's like he never went away."
And then she closed her eyes,
and saw him there that day.
And to her mothers amazement,
she witnessed with surprise.
A room full of daddies and children,
all starting to close their eyes.
Who knows what they saw before them,
who knows what they felt inside.
Perhaps for merely a second,
they saw him at her side.
"I know you're with me Daddy,"
to the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers,
of those once filled with doubt.
Not one in that room could explain it,
for each of their eyes had been closed.
But there on the desk beside her,
was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose
And a child was blessed, if only for a moment,
by the love of her shining star.
And given the gift of believing,
that heaven is never too far.

Such a heart wrenching poem. But she has faith that makes you want to believe in the impossible.

tyoriginal

[Disclaimer: I do not own this poem, Cheryl Costello-Forshey does.]

So...

2011-03-23T17:32:00.003+08:00

Apparently Level 42 is not limbo. Blah. Proven untrue by a certain David whom I've just met and added on facebook yesterday T_T Now I regret adding him. I wanna be top 3! Selama-lamanya!

And I don't know how to write my electric assignment. Been cracking my head for it and I can't get past 2 sentences. GAAAAH.

There's also this scholarship essay asking me to describe my most meaningful achievements and relate them to my career goals in the future. It hard! My most meaningful achievements basically just involves me winning something, or being a part of a team that won something. How am I supposed to relate that to my career goals I don't know. :(

Plus, I'm really sick of waking up to a million unread sms-es and multiple miss calls. Helloooo? You people have nothing to do but text me all day long is it? Seriously considering switching off my phone while I'm asleep and only switching it back on when I'm ready to start the day sigh.

tyoriginal

I have upgraded from awesome

2011-03-23T02:01:00.002+08:00

And am now the MASTER of stereo pair 3D image rendering. How powderful iz dat!? Took me a whole bloody day to finally get an epiphany about it. I mean, the first coupla tries were ok but after the epiphany, it was just BOOM BOOM POW all the way :D

Ahh ok. I have only done 11 stereo pair images so far, and blogger's a bitch who resizes every image I upload (so sorry MT! But you can view most of them on Facebook anyway) so I'm very, very sorry if I inadvertently spammed your home page with stereo pair images all day long. But on the bright side, there are new converts!

Hello dear intelligent youngins. Bid the 2D world goodbye. Stereo pair images are the new black. DSLR's are only good for clarity. Nothing else. Speaking of which, I should get myself a camera soon. I want to experiment some more, in fact, SO MUCH more but I just can't do it with my BB's cam. Or the web cam. Or I can, but I just can't be bothered to try because if I'm going to sit in front of the laptop I might as well be googling for better quality pictahs to render into stereo pair images right?

Hmm, oh well that's it. For those of you who keep complaining about eye pain and headaches, your job is only the view the pictahs T_T You want to know how many times I have to cross my eye while editing the pictahs? The answer is 1873486351634 times. My eyes are almost permanently crossed now. Have to learn to divert my eyes instead.

Anyhow, have fun in the 3D world! Join the dark side.

tyoriginal

I feel awesome.

2011-03-22T11:54:00.004+08:00

How awesome? THIS awesome. Just made like 197618643 stereo pair images with pictures stolen from www.weheartit.com

Now, just to get past this stage of awesomeness to be awesome enough to start doing my damn assignment that's due tomorrow.

Here's one of the many:

3D Hungry Cat (stereo pair)

What exactly are stereo pair images? They are images that you view with your eyes crossed and it will give a 3D illusion. Hello world of 3D motion pictures without the annoying 3D glasses! The trick is, you cross your eyes until you see 3 similar images, then focus on the middle picture and start to relax and VOILA, 3D!

If my explanation isn't good enough, please go visit the link in THIS post for a tutorial.

enjoy~

tyoriginal

My primary friends.

2011-03-22T08:06:00.006+08:00

And by that, I mean primary as in main and not primary as in primary school. See, here in KK, aside from my course mates, I don't talk to many other people. I mean, not that I need to because there's a whole lot of course mates that I have, and by course mates I don't just mean people in my course but generally people from UMS. Of which leads to today's blog post.

1. My 2nd favourite Kon Lo Mee stall owner

Whom I call Ah Pek. Because he is at least 3 times my age. This rickety old man makes the 2nd best kon lo mee I've ever tasted in my life! The first time I visited his stall, I seriously doubted his ability to remain upright, much less make me a bowl of kon lo mee T_T Sorry Ah Pek. But so it turns out, because ever since my roommate and my ex-school mate started dating, I've been devoid of personal communication and therefore I seeked refuge at his Kon Lo Mee stall. :D

Just now while I was eating 7am Pan Mee, he walked past and said "Ehh? Wake up so early today ah?" Bloody hell la Ah Pek! I cannot wake up early ke? Why you open your stall so late T_T

2. The Pan Mee chef

The Pan Mee chef is the awesomest dude EVER. He's huge, like a bloody life sized teddy bear (btw, life sized teddy's scare the living hell out of me). And his hands are softer than mine T_T I don't know if I should feel fail. But every single time I go for 7am Pan Mee, even if someone else is making Pan Mee at that time, he'll personally make my bowl because I like his Pan Mee and not the other uncle's one. Which leads me to my 3rd primary friend in KK.

3. The Pan Mee shop Lady Boss

This Lady Boss is so badass I don't even know how to begin to describe her. For starters, she's also about 3 times my age. Secondly, if you place an order with her, your order comes as fast as lightning. Because she's the boss, duh. Hahaha! And for her age, she can do calculation faster than I can say "errrrr....". She's the person in charge of all the paying in the shop and she seems to be omnipresent.

Also, she scares the living hell out of anyone who's not her friend because she'll go "WANNA EAT WHAT? WHY SO LONG? YOU TAKE LONGER NO NEED EAT." OMG DAMN SCARY OK! But she's really nice to me. Always smiling and asking me if I need anything else T_T How laaaaa. I don't have a name for her, other than *si tao poh* which means Lady Boss in Cantonese.

4. The mamak dude in Alamesra

Whenever I have a break in between classes, I'll go over to Alamesra which is right opposite UMS (and 1Borneo is right next to UMS, how cool is that huh. Not as cool as Steph's college obviously cos there's a whore house right next to it hahaha!) for Nasi Campur and Kopi Ping (ais). And he's my friend because he always give me a 20 cents discount. LOL!

It's not bias. At all! If you go there as often as I do, he'll probably give you a discount too. On some days, I'll end up visiting that mamak for 2 or even 3 times. Loyal customer wei. But, there's nothing much to complain about. Their nasi campur is good, not very overpriced like everything else in Alamesra, and the coffee is KAO, just the way I like it.

5. The ex-mamak chef in Kingfisher

In case you don't know yet, Kingfisher is the name of the area I live in. And this mamak is located right behind my house. So logically, every time I want a midnight snack, or an early morning snack, or a mid day snack (swt why am I so hungry all the time), I'll just have to walk out of my back door, across the street and I'm there.

Although this friendly Sri Lankan fella have left the mamak and gone to seek better income in KL, I believe he still qualifies in this list. Because, he's like my (ex) best friend in KK! He's always greeting people with a smile, and he's the only person to NEVER get my combo wrong. T_T I am so touched.

Also, whenever I'm doing last minute studying in the mamak, he'll turn the TV volume down so I can study better. And when I run out of coffee, he'll brew me multiple extra cups for free. How awesome is that. I bet you wish you had a mamak friend too eh? Ahaha but anyway, I was quite sad he was leaving KK (this happened last year) so we exchanged numbers and I promised to visit him in his new mamak.

But alas, my phone had problems last year, and I think he called me once but I didn't pick up or something so we just lost contact like that. :( Anyhow, now the mamak has been taken over by a new management. They are alright, also very friendly, but I don't feel right visiting the mamak without the tukang masak there anymore. It's just not the same.

6. The Museum Kopitiam waitress

I like the Museum Kopitiam for various reasons. First, because they have the HOT SET (2 half boiled eggs, 1 kaya toast and 1 cuppa hot coffee) for only RM5.00. Second, because there's free wifi (slut). Third, because they play awesome movies (one time I was there, they were playing Inglourious Basterds!). Fourth, because even though it's another kopitiam, they don't try to copy Old Town's concept. Which IMO is pretty damn cool! Fifth, because their Pandan Chicken Rice is to die for.

The Museum Kopitiam waitress knows my order so well that she doesn't even have to ask to know what I want to eat. Provided, sometimes I want the Hot Set and sometimes, I want Pandan Chicken Rice with coffee. But she somehow knows! T_T I think I have a very distinct hunger face swt. But anyway, it's not exactly my favourite place to be, which is why she's at Number 6.

Reasons are because the food comes a tad bit slow, and also the other day, this other dude took my order and completely forgotten to give me mah food. I waited for 1 whole friggin hour with a growling stomach wtf. Damn sad.

Anyhow, I think that's all for my list of primary friends in KK. I wanted to throw in the Ice Bar woman but I haven't been visiting Ice Bar for a long time already. I also wanted to throw in my favourite Kon Lo Mee stall owner but even though I prefer his Kon Lo Mee over Ah Pek's one, its hard to talk to him cos he's so busy all the time! And also because lately, whenever I want to eat Kon Lo Mee I'll just go to Ah Pek's stall because I get to park under the shade (slut).

It's not that bad right? I have 6 good friends here. Although 4/6 of them are 3 times my age, but it's still awesome to find people who genuinely care about you. :D

[Disclaimer: All pics were stolen from Google Image Search results]

tyoriginal

This is how you spam blog.

2011-03-21T06:48:00.002+08:00

Generate your own Y U NO meme HERE.

Aaaaaand, that should about sum up the past 11 hours.

tyoriginal

Beware the Level 42.

2011-03-21T00:58:00.003+08:00

When you reach Level 42 in CSI: Crime City (facebook application), you're in limbo. Yet to be proven true as I have not accumulated enough experience points to get to Level 43. But there are 2 players in front of me, who have been in Level 42 for a lonnggggg time now, and they are active players. But they are still in Level 42, which just goes to say, my theory is just 1 step away from being proven true.

Anyhow, bragging time! Why hello there another 2 completed memorabilia sets (Ammunition & Keys).

Behold, this is what my lab looks like now. The gun rack is from the completed Ammunition memorabilia set and the new flooring is from the completed Keys memorabilia set.

Just to rub it in further, this is page 1 of my insects collection:

And this is Page 4:

Yeah, go ahead, blink, rub your eyes, squint, stare at the image above cross-eyed. It doesn't change the fact that it says 30 out of 35 insects ahahahaha! (insert slap to self here for being over show-off)

Oh and I absolutely love the Gold Scarab Beetle from Page 1. It's so shiny! And there are plenty of pendants around with a Gold Scarab Beetle charm. Which are sooo pretty. Gotta get my hands on one some day. (after I get over my fear of insects)

Be jealous! Be very jealous of

tyoriginal

Suck it up.

2011-03-20T22:51:00.002+08:00

At times such as this, 1 chapter left to study for tomorrow morning's exam, nose is running, eyes are teary, and no one is there to boil me a cuppa coffee or for me to talk to about the shittiness of which I am feeling now, that I really wish that you were here. Then again, even if you were here, would I be able to count on you to reassure me and get me back on my feet again?

Ahhhh well. Suck it up TY. Time is running out.

tyoriginal

3D pictures anytime, anywhere!

2011-03-20T19:16:00.001+08:00

Check out the tutorial here:

http://www.neilcreek.com/blog/2008/02/28/how-to-see-3d-photos/

The first time I got it, I was so freaked out I nearly fell off my chair. But it's so cool!

tyoriginal

Academic Quiz 2011

2011-03-20T02:19:00.004+08:00

So hello again, after a short nap I finally can feel my limbs again (stamina is fail. I know. I took the Quaker Oats heart test thing and they say I'm in medium risk of a stroke -_-") Anyhow, I shall cut to the chase and just upload pictahs.

This is our team, a.k.a. Team BANZAI~ And that expression we are sporting? That's called Mukbang, short for Muka Bangga. Bwahahahaha.

As you can see, I'm solving one question and my 2 teammates are solving another question. In every station, we have to solve 2 questions before we can pass. And at every station, I'll be solving a question all by mahself (forever alone) and then running over to help my teammates solve their question (completely useless teammates T_T)

Here's a pictah of my useless teammates posing for the camera while I was cracking my head over my question T_T It's a miracle we won I'm telling you. No kidding!

I remember this station very, very well. It was the 6th station we were at. And the questions were impossible to solve! Actually, it was relatively simple but the solution given to the station master was for another question so after cracking my head over and over again for the possible other ways to solve it and end with the *right* value for a grand total of about.. 10 minutes, the station master declared that it's a bonus question. Tension saje! 10 minutes is a lot of time if you're racing ok T_T

This was after our 10th station, running back to the foyer for the qualifying round. I'm that blur black object on the right of the picture. The white thing where my hair is is my name tag. I run like the wind!!! (or, I just wanted to win pfft)

This final pictah bears no significant whatsoever. It just has 4/5 members of the poyo pren-pren group in it. From left, Poyo, Russ, Scott and I. This picture also serves as a proof that I do have a ass thank you very much. Although it may still be in the process of developing itself, ITS THERE. Oh and this was us chilling while waiting for the other groups to finish. This was also when I gulped down almost 2 Litres of water and ended up going to the toilet for 6 times -_-"

Ok, that's all. I stole those pictahs from a first year junior, who's very dedicated at his job.

tyoriginal

There's just too much WIN in us.

2011-03-19T14:59:00.003+08:00

Hello all, just got back from running around the engineering faculty for a treasure hunt styled academic quiz. Crazy tired, both mentally and physically. Crazy happy too, cos we were the 2nd group to finish the entire course, and on top of that we were also the 1st runner up for the competition itself! Yoohoooo!

Anyway, we got conned. Thought it would be a cash prize. But they took the cash and got us a hamper instead. Well, at least I won't have to go shopping for biscuits for the next month or so~

This is my portion of the hamper, we also donated quite a lot of the stuff in the hamper to the committee members cos without their help we probably wouldn't have gotten what we got. :D

Also, we were probably the team that will be most unlikely to win. But thanks to our soft skillz (coming to class late every time hence knowing the exact location of classrooms without even thinking, copying tutorial solutions so many times we memorized the entire thing etc.) we made it!

Well, that's all. I really have to take a bath.

tyoriginal

Today, I have been accused of plagiarizing.

2011-03-18T21:00:00.004+08:00

UPDATE:

So I've also found out that this is not the first time such a thing happened with this particular lecturer. Apparently, 3 years ago, a medic student was accused of plagiarizing by the same lecturer for the same reason - because his grammar was flawless.

Tell me, what is wrong with the world? I want to report this lecturer but at the same time, I'm terribly afraid that what I did was indeed plagiarizing. On the other hand, I don't want to report her because I just can't be bothered to take any more of her bullshit.

Ah well, life's short. No time for bullies.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Apparently, so I have learnt today, you cannot add things into a paragraph taken from the internet and not be accused of plagiarizing. Which is terrible because I never knew that. And of course, what's worse than what it would initially be was that this was a group assignment and I was the person in charge of editing the entire piece to look pretty.

But alas, a student's grammar shouldn't be perfect. Because we are students, and therefore we have bad grammar. Which is a completely new stereotype to me because why can't students have perfect grammar? I am horrified, mainly because I caused my group to land with a bright red 0 (thank goodness this assignment is only worth 5%), and because plagiarizing is something that I vowed not to ever get myself into at the beginning of university and yet, now I am accused of it, also because no matter what I say or do, my lecturer wouldn't listen to me.

It was 13 sentences. With interjections in between. But that was still plagiarism. Note to self, next time, read everything and please oh god please rid me of my damn photographic memory.

tyoriginal

The thing about kids.

2011-03-17T22:30:00.002+08:00

Every woman dreams about having their own child. Especially when they see someone close to them have a newborn. It's always the "ZOMG SOOOO CUTEEEE!!!" I SO WANNA HAVE A KID.

Yes, babies are cute. For Christ's sake, even their puke is cute (insert slap here). They are all fun and full of laughter (apart from the midnight wailing for attention pfft. such attention sluts.) But we adore them all the same.

But babies will evolve into children, which are still plenty adorable, although they do squabble once a while and some children can be hella loud and messy. They doodle all over the pretty walls of your house and spread the crayon graffiti mayhem all over your lovely white couch. But you get to dress them up in pretty clothes and watch them learn how to speak and communicate which is a very fulfilling thing.

However, children evolve into teenagers. And I can remember back when I was a teenager, I used to drive my parents up the wall with the crap I get myself into. Sure, I was Assistant Head Prefect and president of countless clubs and school/district representative for all sorts of things, even was in the top class what an overachiever I was. But outside of school, I was just another bitchy teenager. I complained about everything, dated so many guys I lost count. Went out despite not finishing my homework and never, EVER helped out at home. (Actually, I didn't need to help out. What's a maid for if they don't do the housework?)

IMAGINE YOUR PRECIOUS CHILD BECOMING THIS. (OK, I know I'm not exactly in the right position to say that because I'm quite screwed up as well. But I can be proud to say that I don't have such pictures of me on teh internets.)

And every single time my [still developing] maternal instincts kick in, all I need to do is just walk out my house here in Sabah where I can hear my neighbor kids yelling their heads off at each other, it's a slap that brings me back to "Why the hell would ANYONE want kids." Like seriously. They are noisy, messy, ridiculous, troublesome, and ALL of them are attention sluts. I want to be the biggest attention slut forever!

Obviously I've already lost to Alastair Galpin. In case you don't know who that is, he's the BIGGEST EVER attention slut I've ever came to know of. I mean, he has 28 different Guinness World Records! Of which includes having the most amount of snails (8) remain on his face for 10 seconds, wearing the most socks on one feet (70), and having the longest handshake ever (9 hours). I lose. I lose forever T_T I can never be that shameless.

So people, next time your maternal instincts kick in, think about the wailing and the mess (Oh God the mess.) that you're gonna have to deal with. *smug face*

tyoriginal

On Malaysian politics.

2011-03-16T12:46:00.006+08:00

I just read an article/letter by a chinese person living in the states on Facebook. It pissed me off. First, because that person does not know the first thing about Malaysian politics, and 2nd, because even if he/she didn't, all he/she did was pointed out was how depressing everything is, and not offering us a way out.

1. How is Anwar the light at the end of the tunnel? IMO, both competing parties are equally racist, did you know that Anwar was the person who started the mass malay system in schools back when he was the education minister? Bet you didn't know that. He favoured the Malay language and encouraged Bahasa Melayu as Bahasa Malaysia as his top priority.

2. You talk about working extra hard and somehow, opportunity landed and you were lucky. But not everyone gets that opportunity. Some are more than happy to take what they are given and live with it, albeit in racial discriminance. And you, a person who has been given that opportunity to study and subsequently live in a much better place have no right to point at us and insult us to our faces. Telling us that we are not working hard enough therefore we don't deserve the same opportunity you had.

Great way to start the day huh? And people keep sharing the bloody note like it's the best thing that's ever happened. READ IT WITH YOUR EYES OPEN NEXT TIME!

tyoriginal

Lalalaala

2011-03-15T23:33:00.002+08:00

I'm bored. And free, surprisingly. There's now assignments due this week, I've done all my lab reports, no tutorials to finish and the next exam is next Monday. Which is such a long time more. :( I think I have a problem. When I'm busy, I complain endlessly. When I'm free, I complain endlessly too.

Why do I complain so much? Yikes!

Anyhow, interesting observation. After my eyeliner day, which was yesterday, I noticed that today in class, there were 5 extra people sporting eyeliner when usually, there's only 1 person in class with any makeup on. LOL! I am such a trend setter *perasan*

But it's true! Not the first time after I've done something, a horde of classmates start doing it too! Like back in Semester 1 where I dyed my hair yellow and it turned out orange? A month after that there were 4 other persons who dyed their hair zomg.

Then there was the heels. I started wearing heels to classes in Semester 2, and back then, only 1 other person wore heels to class (cos she's awesome, like me). And now, almost all the girls in class wear heels. I'm not kidding you!!!

Of course, there was the drinking. In Semester 1 and 2, I was the only person in class who bothered to opt not to wrap myself in a warm blanket in the hostel instead of having a fun night out hitting the bars. But last semester, 2 other persons joined me. And this semester, there are 6 of us. (BTW, drink responsibly folks)

Hmm, I wonder what trend I should set next. Perhaps wearing sunnies...

tyoriginal

To appreciate.

2011-03-14T19:47:00.002+08:00

There are instances in life where we owe someone a favour of some sort and hence we appreciate them. There are also instances in life where we receive a gift of some sort and hence we appreciate the giver.

However, what I'm wondering about is: Is it an obligation to appreciate said giver?

I've been trying so hard for so long, and still, I don't know what I'm doing wrong. It's highly frustrating and I'm on the verge of imploding.

angst is high.

tyoriginal

Eyeliner Day recap.

2011-03-14T17:19:00.003+08:00

Hello all! As some of you know, today was my self-proclaimed eyeliner day. Eyeliner day happened because yesterday night, I was on an MCR roll and posted in one of my private groups on Facebook that "IM ON AN MCR ROLLLLLL!!!" Which led to the comment by someone asking whether I'm gonna come to uni all goth today. And, yes. That was my plan.

I so wanted to go to uni as a skunk today. Pfft. That's until I remembered that I had a presentation today, so no heavy skunkery for me :( What a shame though. I always wanted to abuse my eyeliners. But then again to achieve the above I probably would've needed gel liners instead of pencil & liquid liners only.

Anyhow, this is me at the end of eyeliner day. It was exceptionally hot today, maybe the person up in the sky didn't want me to go goth or something but it totally screwed with eyeliner day ok. 1st, cos my liquid eyeliner isn't waterproof agghhhh. However, my pencil eyeliner *is* waterproof so I put on 5 layers of eyeliner wtf thinking it will minimize the smudging but wth. I sweat like a pig.

Also, after applying the eyeliner, I realized I can't find my bloody mascara!!! T_T Kenapaaa. Damnit I should really start looking for it or finally get my hands on the Maybelline one that I've been eyeing on for ages. T_T For the most part of the day, this was how I looked. Because I wanted to cover up the shame which is my eyelashes are not long and awesome and I terhilang my weapon of choice.

However, if I did find it, I could possibly look awesome like this.

Behold, the power of photoCHOP.

Well, glad that eyeliner day is over. It was crazy to even attempt such a dumb thing on such a hot day ahahaha but it was all good fun. Twas not good that the classroom we were supposed to do our presentation in was at the top floor of the faculty, and also not good that I had to climb 3 flights of stairs 4 times because I'm such a dumbass (I just wanted to hand in my Russian assignment draft T_T), and also not good that the library is humongous that just to return 2 books I had to take a damn big detour.

But the best part of today is that I finally had 鸡丝河粉!!! O yea.

tyoriginal

Thou shall STAY PUT!!!

2011-03-14T12:50:00.002+08:00

And NOT fall off your chair. I had the most insulting accusation since the DP change.

Like SRSLY. WTF? This makes the smell of oil and fried food seem like marshmallows clouds.

tyoriginal

Have a little sympathy, suckas.

2011-03-14T12:27:00.002+08:00

I know you're good at cooking. I know your significant other acknowledges that. I know you like to cook for each other. But, it's a blazing hot Monday afternoon could you NOT throw everything into the deep fryer and MAKE MY ENTIRE BLOODY ROOM SMELL LIKE OIL AND FOOD???

Bitch.

>_>!!!!!

Like srsly. I usually don't mind, if the weather is tolerable, i.e. rainy and windy (like it is 99% of the time) BUT IT HOT NAO! And this bloody weather makes my room stuffy enough without you forcing the smell of deep fried goods in here! (fyi, not much of a choice, my room is right above the kitchen)

T_T Don't say I've never told you this before. Now even if I say anything you're already done with the frying. Sigh. Why you so like dat lah.

tyoriginal

Is your facebook newsfeed going mad?

2011-03-14T02:20:00.002+08:00

Mine is. Almost everyone's status update is about Datuk Lee Chong Wei beating Lin Dan in the All-England Open finals. And some of them were even thick-faced enough to assume that tomorrow will be a public holiday because the last time Malaysia won at something (which was the day before new year's eve), we had a public holiday.

This is the best status update I've seen so far though:

‎@NajibRazak : Sorry tmrw not a public holiday. We have to rejoice in Chong Wei's victory n at the same time work hard so that we have more victories.

Bwahahaha! In your face slackers! Now stop being a lazy ass. All you did was watch TV. Why do you deserve a holiday huh?

tyoriginal

Oh yea I jelly.

2011-03-12T19:43:00.002+08:00

I could complain and complain about how people are so sickeningly attached to each other but at the end of the day, it's just cos I jelly.

That aside, white splatter brushes for photoshop on a black background always end up looking like someone came on the canvas. Yuck. And swirl brushes always look the same. Maybe I'm just on a really short fuse cos I've lost my voice and my nose is a leaky, and because I need dinner but it's raining like bloody hell out there. And also because I kinda screwed up my 3rd artwork. Apparently, 2 beaches + 1 sakura blossom = disaster. It looked so good in my head sighhhhhhh.

tyoriginal

Ступид Рассиан

2011-03-11T04:03:00.002+08:00

Of all the subjects I have taken, Russian still proves to be the toughest and most taxing one. 4am, and for the past 3 hours, 1 exercise, which I still don't understand.

1 exercise, 10 questions. Would've finished an English exercise in 10 seconds. Oh god!

P.S.-the title isn't even spelled correctly, but let's just see how good google translate is.

tyoriginal

You see

2011-03-11T01:27:00.001+08:00

Ya can't please everyone, so ya got to please yourself.

If you haven't heard of this awesome song yet, you should. Garden Party by Ricky Nelson.

tyoriginal

O-HAI~

2011-03-09T19:00:00.003+08:00

Yes, I finally got in touch with PS-ing again. After such a long time... And although my first artwork was OK. I mean, I superimposed one of my coursemate's head onto a pict of Borat in his mankini (AGAHAHAHAHA still can't stop laughing about it) and someone actually asked me if it was a real pict LOL! This person either thinks very lowly of said coursemate or my PS-ing skillz is the awesome shitz.

But my 2nd artwork however... I'll just let you judge for yourself.

I don't know if this is a failure or a success but if I ever become a plastic surgeon, all my patients will look like this.

The success part is where I managed to turn the original pictah into the above. And you'll never believe who the eyes belong to.

The not-so-success part was where I kinda screwed up the original lips and then downloaded 2 different brush packs just so I could top layer after layer of plump lips to cover up my screwed up original piece. But in the end the lips look ok also what!

The fail part, was when the hair came in. I forgot to duplicate the original pictah before chopping all her hair off so that I could see how this new hair would look on her T_T then I realized this hair is not suitable because the person who made this hair is so fail. After about 208732497 times of color overlaying, finally the hair colour doesn't look like a bunch of lala hays.

But it was still fail cos even though the hair colour was finally settled, there was still a lot of other factors to consider such as whether the hair makes my original pic look nicer or uglier T_T

Anyway, just to make things less confusing, this iz the original pic.

Yea I know right. How did I go from this to the one above. ZOMG.

tyoriginal

All good things come to those who?

2011-03-08T16:38:00.006+08:00

WAIT. That's the word - WAIT. Maybe I should thank Billance because he refused to let me redeem my free Sbux drink today that's why I didn't go to 1B for lunch where I would've bought my calculator from Harris. Or I should thank the Alamesra stationery shop, because they only sell RM15 Casio 82MS calculators, which I don't want, 570MS FTW. Or, I should thank the UMS Koperasi for being slackers and closing during lunch hour, which is from 12 noon - 2 pm.

Either way, my soul has been found again. I thought it was stolen, thank goodness it was just a scare kidnap case. BAH! And I'm glad I did not succumb to my hatred for the Texas Instruments calculator, which in any case was almost completely useless because it didn't have any of the constants which I need.

Anyhow, I still missed 7am Pan Mee, but I made it for 8am Pan Mee which was interesting because half way through, the shop people started chiming SA-MAN, SA-MAN, SA-MAN and true enough! Some men in blue were opposite the road with their saman books, writing down as many number plates of illegally parked cars as they could! Twas a good thing my car was parked on the shop's side of the road so I fled.

Parked my car at a legitimate parking spot of course, because I HAVEN'T FINISHED EATING MAH PAN MEE YET!!! The Pan Mee shop sells the best Pan Mee EVER. I'm serious. Not kidding you. Although many people keep telling me that the one in Damai is soo much nicer and tastier and blablabla I don't care. Do you think the Damai Pan Mee shop people will chant SA-MAN if they see men in blue? Doubt so.

Conclusion, Kingfisher's Pan Mee is the awesomest shitzz.

A pictah of a bowl of Pan Mee to emphasize my Pan Mee iz awesome point.

On a side note, 1 of the messages in my phone this morning (another 1 was a useless comment that I shall comment about after this one, and the other 8 were questions after questions about the Annual Dinner zomg.) was about my new FB profile pic. Err, not the current one, the meditation one. Apparently, Christianity is against yoga. See, this is the part where I go wtf do you care if I was in the lotus position or the bare my soul position? My picture was up because my previous picture was 1 year old and for the past week, every single time I was online, at least 1 person will go "OI WHEN YOU GONNA CHANGE YOUR PIC?"

Like srsly.

And second, since when is Christianity against yoga? Read up! Yoga isn't some weird-ass cult tradition thing but just another method for people to calm themselves down without swearing loudly. To tell the truth, I much prefer swearing loudly. It takes less time, and you get straight to the point. But if I were to post a pict of me swearing loudly, it just looks like I'm going eat people up for the rest of the 1 year this pict is going to be up.

Third, and completely unrelated, why does no one believe me when I say that I *was* meditating? What now I can't meditate? Ok truth, I wasn't meditating LOL. Why should I meditate when I can just swear loudly? Honestly!

And 1 of the messages regarding the Annual Dinner implies that I'm much too strict and I rule my committee members like a bloody dictator therefore my team is afraid of me. Here's what I have to say:

1. I am not a dictator. The deadlines have been predetermined since January, and what can I say if you take forever to get something that was due 2 weeks ago?

2. I am fierce? You have not seen me being fierce. Not cracking jokes every 5 minutes is standard protocol for a formal meeting. What do you expect me to do? Make everything fun and fluffy and cute so that all of you can be my friends? Sorry to say, in this situation, I'm the leader and you do what I say (ok, that made me sound like a dictator). If you give me good ideas and obey deadlines, I'll praise you. Heck, even treat you to a good meal.

But if you give me bullshit ideas and excuses after excuses about how you can't get a simple thing done, and expect me to go easy on you (i.e. forgive you and give you a lollipop to suck on while you're wasting more of everyone's time) then you're being ridiculous. This event isn't about you, its about the final year students.

True, you may be feeling the pressure of being a part of my committee, but that's the way it's going to be. You are a committee member, your incentive for being one has been laid out for you before you even decided to join the committee. So conclusion, shut up and do your work. And when you're finally done with your damn part, we'll talk.

3. We are running on a tight deadline. Most of the things have been done a bit too late, and we are currently lagging by 1 week compared to the original planning. So why should I waste time by being fun and bubbly when there are things that need to be done? Most importantly, how could you not understand the importance in which we finish everything as soon as possible? Who knows what's going to happen next week? In fact, who knows what's going to happen tomorrow? Fact. Just 2 hours ago, my lecturer decided that we should do our presentation on the assignment we handed in 1 month ago tomorrow afternoon. Honestly, how are we going to know if the lecturers are suddenly called away on a conference call? How are we to know that maybe next week, some outbreak might happen and everything is halted, yet again?

4. Just how inconsiderate and shallow are you to make such a naive assumption about this matter? Another fact, I'm not answerable to you. But the fact that I took 5 minutes out of my day to type this post out shows that I actually do give a damn, provided you cooperate from now on and don't step on any toes. Or you're fired. (Note: this person isn't even one of the main board of committee. I don't see what the problem is. The workload isn't even terribly heavy.)

That turned out to be quite a long post. Anyhow, I need to get back to studying now that I have my trusty calculator with me again. Good day everyone!

tyoriginal

NEWSFLASH!

2011-03-07T19:17:00.002+08:00

I lost my calculator!!!

My soul has died. How could I lose it now. When I need it so. DAMN IT.

tyoriginal

It's gonna be LEGEN---

2011-03-07T17:50:00.003+08:00

Wait for it...

DARY!

LEGENDARY.

March is going to be a crazy busy month. What with the finalization in planning for the Annual Dinner thingamajig. I'm happy to say that everyone's been really cooperative so far, the committee members are giving their best and I love them all to bits, they come up with brilliant ideas, obey deadlines omg how not to love them! And then there's the whole series of exams yet to be taken, and there's events, events and more events every single week!

My March Planner is as such:

9th - Electric Mid-Term

11th - Russian 3 Mid-Term

12th - Chem Engr. Academic Quiz

18th - Russian 3 Group Assignment due date

18th - St. Patrick's Day celebration @ Waterfront (hahahaha I know so unrelated BUT I DIE DIE MUST JOIN THIS YEAR'S ONE!!!!)

(side note: Happy early St. Patrick's Day ya'll! Spongebob wishes you the same too.)

21st - Heat Transfer Test 2

26th - Chem Engr. Family Day

Anyway, it's just another 1 month of studying to go and then it's time for Finals already. I'm excited, because so many things are going to be happening in this one month, but also very afraid that I will not be ready in time for Finals. Either way, March/April will be LEGENDARY.

Expect plenty of nonsensical status updates on facebook, some of me raging, some of me emo-ing, some of me just MMOB, and also plenty of updates here. I'm sure you'll be seeing a lot of my complains about how some people just can't do things right (which is, the way I expect it to be. I am always right! Remember?) and happy posts about good days where I start the day with eating Pan Mee at 7am.

Little things. Happy or sad. It's gonna be one hell of a ride.

tyoriginal

Do you play PvZ?

2011-03-06T05:15:00.005+08:00

PvZ is short for Plants VS Zombies, which is a game by Pop Cap that has been zombifying people around the world for a few years now.

So the question of the day is, do you play PvZ? I play PvZ, albeit a bit too much (especially when I'm procrastinating...). As of today, I have played PvZ for a total of 6 times now. I know right, I am so addicted but how can you say no to this?

Reason 1: The zombies are way too cute to be true. The way they go "braaaainnnssss.... rwar, braaaaiinssss..." is just so irresistible it just makes you want to kill them all!

Reason 2: The almanac has awesome descriptions.

Reason 3: There is a ZEN GARDEN! ZOMG. You can water your plants, play music for them, give them pesticides, and in return, they give you $$$.

Reason 4: The sunflowers are way too cute. They actually bounce/bop to an unknown beat, and every single sunflower bounces/bops at its own timing!

Reason 5: It's a really simple game and it's straight to the point. You want to slow the zombies down? Use plants that are blue. Want to attack the zombies from above them (in cases where the zombies have shields), use the catapult series. Want to make your plant pellets give extra damage? Add a torchwood in front of the plants to make the pellets BURN WITH RAGE AHAHAHA.

Reason 6: It is addictive. Once you start playing, you just can't stop! I didn't believe this at first, thinking it's just me cos I'm such an achievement slut, so I gave the game to Ken Shi. And they played it ALL NIGHT LONG, for about 3 days straight until they finish the entire adventure round LOL!

Reason 7: Even if you find the adventure mode not challenging enough, there is the Survival mode. Where you can test your carefully laid out strategies to kill em zombies.

Reason 8: Your faithful friend and helper is Crazy Dave, who is, uhh, crazy. He also owns the shop in the game where you buy fertilizers and upgrades for your plants along with all sorts of other things including a coin collecting snail called Stinky who is addicted to chocolates.

So if you haven't played PvZ, you should. But there is one downside to the game. I absolutely hate THIS zombie.

This is the Dolphin Rider Zombie. True to its name, it rides a bloody dolphin. I hate this zombie for 3 reasons:

1. It is fast. I dislike fast zombies.

2. It makes this really irritating sound whenever it appears (something like eeeekekekekekekekekkk)

3. It rides a zombie dolphin! ZOMBIE DOLPHINS SHOULD RIDE IT. PFFFT. Stupid zombie.

But all in all, I am still addicted to the game, and I am now completing my 7th round of adventure mode. So what are you waiting for? PvZ CALLS.

tyoriginal

When things go wrong

2011-03-04T15:19:00.003+08:00

I usually berate myself into working harder, because hard work always pays off. And it does, it really does. All it needs is a lot of initiative and before you know it, the road is smoothed out again. And there you are, on a highway to success, until the next block in the road.

And just to be a show off, I scored like a mad genius again in Thermo. So much so that they now pronounce the Thermo lecturer as my father (no offense Dad, but I really scored like a mad genius). And I have completed yet another memorabilia set in CSI. Things aren't so bad. Today's paper was simple, I managed to finish it although I arrived a tad bit late because I slept too late last night and only woke up cos my roommate's laptop adapter exploded and stank the whole room. Which was actually a good thing or else I wouldn't have woken up.

Its in times like this that I wonder if there really is a God watching over all of us. But then again, before I can even settle down in this state of content, something bad always happens. So we'll just wait and see.

I overheard a TV documentary today while I was having my breakfast about how the stars, so chaotic and so random are in fact a constant that times the solstices and the season changes. Just makes you wonder, the events in your life, so random and unexpected sometimes, is there actually a significance behind it? A pattern of some sort that allows you to predict the next thing that is going to happen?

And lastly, even after half a year of going through the same bullshit with the same incompetent fool, I'm still angry and upset. I keep telling myself, why bother? You know it's going to happen again. He can't get anything right! He's a good-for-nothing. Don't you know by now to only give a person 1 chance, and at most, 2 at anything? If he fails both times, he fails. I should just take over the project. Save myself time and disappointment all over again.

How would you feel if you've paid for something a year ago and every time your product comes to you it's either in the wrong size, or there's a mistake in your name's spelling, or the company ran out of the material you wanted, or the person in charge of this purchase is a good for nothing fool who can't get anything right?

Same fool is in charge of putting down the time line for this event I was talking about earlier. It's a 5 minutes job. Can't even do it. I should fire him. But my conscience tells me to give him another try. Why should I? Counters my ever logical brain. And I keep thinking, why should I? But I still don't fire him. Why? I don't know either.

When I reached home just now, I saw a Pos Laju truck parked outside my house. Thinking excitedly that this could finally be something good that's happening today (test results don't count. You know whether you did good or bad right after the paper, there's no need to wait for results.) i.e. receiving Mel's letter. But to my dismay, the parcel was addressed to a Ms Goh whom I've never heard of in my life before. I was tempted to pretend to be a certain Ms Goh just to find out what was in the brown package. But I didn't because of the sweltering heat and because my mind was in bits just now due to something that happened earlier that currently isn't of any significance.

This post is probably very confusing. But that's exactly what's going through my mind right now.

I think, I think too much.

tyoriginal

To share your life

2011-03-02T19:53:00.003+08:00

I wouldn't do that here.

tyoriginal

Another weeeeeeeeeeek

2011-03-01T10:21:00.002+08:00

I bring bad news. I shall not be updating properly (unless if something rly amazing happens) until the 11th because I just received news of another mid-term paper next week boooo.

tyoriginal

So humiliating.

2011-02-28T08:42:00.003+08:00

You'll never guess what I've been doing the last 1 hour.

RUNNING AWAY FROM A HUGE ASS BEE.

Not THIS bee, cos it's way too cute to even be a real bee.

But THIS BEE.

ZOMG RUN RUNNNNNN!!!!

Realistically speaking, the bee was probably less than 1% my size BUT IT WAS A HUGE BEE!!! And I am terrified of flying bugs omg! You name it, flying cockroaches (I'll run from my house to 818 which is like 500m away), BEES, flying ants, moths, ANYTHING THAT FLIES other than birds. Cos birds are pretty, and they sing. Unlike bees who just buzz and sting the crap out of you.

*shudders* It has went somewhere else for now, and that's why I am in front of my laptop without fear now ahahahaha I am so fearless!!!

Ok, gotta get back to last minute revisions, good day ya'll. Hope you don't get chased by a friggin bee.

tyoriginal

smug smile

2011-02-27T03:49:00.002+08:00

I know I'm not supposed to be blogging but studying/playing Blockus instead but, something AWESOME just happened in CSI hehehehehehe. Remember this post?

Well this current post will be the sequel to that one. GUESS WHAT PEOPLE, MY POKER CHIPS SET IS...

COMPLETE!!!!!

And while you're being super jealous cos of my complete memorabilia sets, please also take time to be jealous at my newly unlocked slot machine *BWAAHAHAHA gloating is awesome

Now I just need 1 more bullet, 2 more keys and cards and 14 more bloody insects.

tyoriginal

If you have time

2011-02-26T06:54:00.003+08:00

Do head over to www.bbc.co.uk to find out what's going on in the middle eastern countries at this point. First Tunisia, then Egypt, then I lost track because almost every single country there is revolting right now. Just goes to show,

The saddest part is that the Malaysian government refuses to see that there is a possibility of this revolt here in this currently peaceful land. Power is a scary thing. And as we can see, power in numbers have no problem bringing down power in position.

Let's pray.

tyoriginal

No updates for the coming week.

2011-02-26T05:18:00.003+08:00

It is because I am transforming into my alter-ego, a.k.a. Tsing yang paling rajin. Here's a snapshot (you know, to prove that I am actually studying and not just pretending that I am for the sake of an uploaded picture).

You know what I love about Skype? It's that it is sooo handy for blurry pictures when your camera is somewhere across the ocean and your phone is so retarded it refuses to read the memory card, hence being in denial about its existence jeez goddamn phone it is right there! Right there, in the socket that says Insert Memory Card here >_>!!! Sometimes I am so pissed off with my phone, but other times I absolutely love it due to the wi-fi feature and BBM.

The world is a much better place with BBM like srsly.

Sidenote, a stupid bug bit my left earlobe 2 days ago and it's still swollen. I feel like my head is permanently tipped to the left because of the extra weight of the swell. Stupid bug had no better place to attack me and just had to pick my ear. Why la, my ear got bug food meh? :S

Tsing yang paling rajin hey!

tyoriginal

Y U NO LOAD?

2011-02-24T18:38:00.002+08:00

CSI is down for maintenance (see pic below). I is sad. I cannot has CSI for today :(

Which resulted in me going to the library... Because I can has nothing to do so I shall be hardworking and finish my assignments early zzzz. Such a teacher's pet.

And would you know it, I GOT A VIRGIN BOOK! Yesssss! I can has happy again :D

Too bad I'm still trying to decipher its contents. That's a drag.

tyoriginal

On beauty.

2011-02-24T03:25:00.002+08:00

We've heard it all before, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", "you're too fat/skinny", "you're not the type to look good without makeup" etc.

I spend many (in fact, some may believe that it is too many) hours on the internet and the amount of things I read about are also many and increasingly diverse. Just 10 minutes ago, I stumbled upon this article "Talking to your daughter about beauty" by Emily Heist Moss.

Maybe it's because I grew up in a chinese family so my parents' concern were more towards academic excellence and nurturing us to grow up to be a well rounded person who can take care of ourselves and ultimately them too in the future. As we grow, topics such as sex and homosexuality and substance abuse are constantly talked about but not beauty. And I believe that if people actually understood beauty, there wouldn't be a need to talk about anything else because you have to love yourself to be at ease with anything else.

Imagine a world where children were taught that they are born beautiful from young, imagine the optimism they will sport and imagine the things they can accomplish from all that encouragement and support. So why is it that no one ever talks about beauty? We are concerned with fashion, trends, how to look hot, how to be cool but not how to realize how beautiful each and every one of us are.

In fact, beauty is so taboo a thing that we use so many different things to cover up its original meaning. Chemical powders in a jar, bound feet, long necks, mini waist etc. If people could just accept that beauty isn't something that we have to work for, distort our body's natural alignment and proportion for, or starve ourselves for, then the world would be so much more of a beautiful place.

We've been objectifying too many things, so caught up with what others think and striving to 'fit in' but at the end of the day, is it worth it? You could cake your face with layers upon layers of foundation but eventually, your skin will sag and what will you do then? You could go for cosmetic surgery but that was not who you were meant to be from the beginning. We eventually become shadows of what we were intended to be or to achieve.

We need to stop conforming to what the media and the world says is right but to have opinions of our own, believing in what WE believe in instead of what others think we should believe in and enjoy life without needing to worry about what people will be thinking. And this is just my two cents on the matter. You're welcomed to disagree with me, but I don't know why would you ever in your right mind want to, because deep down inside, you know you agree.

tyoriginal

Too much free time?

2011-02-24T01:24:00.002+08:00

Since I've been moping around recently, apart from the occasional studying and completing assignments and completing tutorial questions and the usual student-y things, it just occured to me that I do have too much free time on my hands! Which leads me to think that maybe I should pick up something like a new instrument or dancing or I don't know, just about anything!

How awesome is it to be able to do that? ZOMG. Ok of course I'm also realistic and realize that it would be quite the impossible for me to pick up ballet now that I'm already *gasp* 22! DUA PULUH-DUA AMBOI! But, I've got a violin at home, and so far, I've only managed to play twinkle twinkle little star on it sigh. So fail.

If I get really good at it, somehow, I do not know how hahaha! Then maybe I'll have more things to do during my free time and creating music is also an excellent mood lifter, so I won't be so depressed all the time. Mmmmm... Maybe I should source out music schools. (just procrastinating from doing my jet engines assignment.. it IS such a bore when you can't find any relevant information online!)

tyoriginal

Oh noes.

2011-02-23T04:26:00.001+08:00

I just finished reading all 22 pages in Jojo Struys' blog. And her blog is just so fascinating that I completely lost track of time oh noes.

Anyway, link -here-

Goodnight peeps,

tyoriginal

Take your time

2011-02-23T00:00:00.000+08:00

Smell the flowers.

p/s: HAHAHAH! I know, this is such a sad excuse for a post but I'm buried deep in busy shit so TTYL JUST SMELL THE DAMN FLOWERS.

p/p/s: Don't they look pretty? :)

tyoriginal